Before I begin writing what I wish to say, I want you to understand that what I share in this post can change your life if you allow it. My life has already been changed.
If you are someone who feels discomfort, or even fear, dread, or anger when discussing the LGBTQ+ community, this post is for you even if you feel like you’d rather stop reading. Instead, I’m asking you to trust me and to believe me when I share my feelings and experiences in this post.
This writing is directed to members of my church, but I believe what I say can touch and help others as well. First, I invite you to please watch this video I made a few months back with the help of my dear brother, Aaron.
*If you would like more details from my growth on this topic, you can read it here.
In the video I said, “I encourage each of us to ask God how we can contribute to the joy, hope, and belonging of the LGBTQ people all around us.”
I have been trying to do this in my life by reading/listening to the experiences of LGBTQ+ individuals, putting loving bumper stickers on my car like “Be Kind” and “Jesus Loves You,” and wearing shirts that say things like “You are Enough,” “Love Thy Neighbor,” and “God loves the people we don’t.” I have similar stickers on my favorite water bottles too. (Try The Happy Givers if you would like to get similar things.) I have lovingly corrected people as they have said insensitive things about the LGBTQ+ community (when I have had the courage and ability to do so). I have written blog posts expressing love for this community and encouraging others to learn to do the same. I have also been a part of a latter-day saint group that meets together to find ways to be better Christlike allies for this community. And finally, because of that ally group, I have had the opportunity and privilege for the past few months to help plan an event that just happened this past Saturday called Gather Conference Southeast.
This conference was a regional subset of the official Gather Conference which is held in Provo, Utah. The goal of Gather Conferences is “to create a hope filled & supportive event for Latter-day Saint LGBTQ individuals, family members, and friends—sharing stories, providing resources and education, creating a community of belonging and connection to Jesus Christ.”
I couldn’t assist in the planning very much once school started, and I almost decided not to go to the conference because I didn’t feel useful, but something told me that I needed to be there. So, I did.
The morning of the conference, I first attended the temple as a dear friend made covenants with God. Then I made my way to the Unitarian Universalist Fellowship of Raleigh, NC.
I was very late for the conference, but when I arrived, I was met with friendly faces who helped me get where I needed to be. I loved the venue that was chosen for this conference. It was evident all around how accepting and loving this fellowship was, making it a perfect place to gather. To help illustrate that, here is a picture I found on their website:
I arrived right before the next session of classes. I visited the registration table first, which had a lot of nice mementos. Everyone also got to write something they wanted to get out of the conference on a strip of colored paper. We made large paper chains with these papers. Here are some of the answers that were given:
It was soon time for the next class, and my friend Misa and I chose to go to the LGBTQ+ Community Listening Session. In retrospect, this class was probably more for members of the LGBTQ+ community than anyone else, but it was such a special, Spirit-filled class.
It started with a video that was so incredibly poignant, it left me breathless. It was called “Souled of Other Stars: A Story of Coming Out and Coming In.”
We all sat in awe for a moment, and then for the rest of the time, we sat in a circle listening to beautiful people share their stories. After each person shared, we all thanked that person by name for sharing. We all listened intently, and you could tell each person in the room really cared and was moved by each story. The stories, experiences, and identities were all so different, but what tied us all together was a desire to listen, love, lift, and understand. I shed tears many times during that session, but I also felt a great sense of hope and I felt God’s love surrounding all there. We ended the session with a group hug that most of us partook in. It was a tight hug, and it felt amazing. I felt so privileged to be amongst these children of God. Here is a picture of the whole group.
After a break, all conference attendees sat together in the sanctuary for an 8-person LGBTQ+ Panel Discussion. This was my favorite part of the day. I was heart-warmed to see that many of the people that were in the listening session were also on the panel. Meghan Decker, a prominent gay latter-day saint author, led the panel in a series of questions. On the panel were gay, lesbian, a-sexual, transgender, non-binary, bi-sexual, and genderqueer individuals.
I cannot even begin to express how much hearing this panel answer questions meant to me. I have already known and cherished much of my brother’s story, but hearing these queer latter-day saints courageously, vulnerably, and honestly share so much about their life experiences and hardships touched my soul so deeply. Their identities, stories, struggles, dreams, testimonies, insights, and paths were all different, but it was clear that each of them loved God, loved their neighbor, and just wanted to be loved and welcomed, and to feel like they belong. I cried a lot during this panel discussion, and I learned what it really means to “mourn with those that mourn and comfort those that stand in need of comfort. (Mosiah 18:9).” If any community needs that, it’s the LGBTQ+ community. My heart broke when panelists burst into tears, and sometimes even sobbed over how they had been treated by church members, friends, and often even their families when they did come out. Though this was sad, there were also happy tears as those in the room could feel the strength of a panelist’s testimony of God’s love for them, their individual worth, and their divine mission on the earth. These dear people knew, or are coming to know, that this was how God created them, and they are doing their best to use their unique gifts to help others.
After this discussion, I honestly didn’t want to leave because there was such a warmth in the room. I felt the Holy Ghost so strongly and a sense of unity that I rarely feel.
It was dinner time. Before that, I rehearsed a musical number that a group of us were singing before the keynote speaker, Richard Ostler. Then I rode with a couple of them to dinner at a delicious restaurant called David’s Dumpling and Noodle Bar. All the panelists, special speakers, and committee members who planned the conference sat together at a huge table.
I was sitting within talking distance of four of the panelists, and it was an amazing time. We were all sharing our food with each other and laughing and joking. Normally in a large group gathering like that, I am very uncomfortable, but this time, I was completely at ease. I smiled because I wouldn’t normally share food with people I don’t know, and I normally would be really self-conscious about food in my teeth or on my face. But in this atmosphere, I was happy and really felt at home. We had all come to the conference for a common goal, and we all felt safe with each other. I loved it and I was filled body and soul.
After dinner it was time to prepare for our keynote speaker, Richard Ostler, who is a very sweet older gentleman who is the host of the Listen, Learn, & Love Book and Podcast. Before he began, I sang “Dear to the Heart of the Shepherd” with three other talented singers. It felt wonderful to sing such a tender song about the Savior’s love to the audience. You can listen to it here or watch it here.
“Papa Ostler,” as he is affectionately called, gave a wonderful address along with a PowerPoint presentation. He shared current church teachings and how they have changed, some personal stories that illustrated how God called him to be an advocate for the LGBTQ+ community, and many stories of LGBTQ+ people he has interviewed for his podcast. Three of the stories were about individuals who served on the panel discussion earlier in the day. I will link to their stories below:
Lindsey Sais (Her comments in my first class and in the panel discussion were some of my favorites. She is very wise and is truly a survivor.)
Jessop Oliver (He was the one I sang a duet with at the beginning of the musical number and sat next to at dinner. He’s a cheerful, kind, and caring young man who lives in Durham.)
Meghan Decker (She is a calm, articulate, and intellectual woman who does a great job of leading a discussion.)
It amazes me how many people Papa Ostler has interviewed (almost 800 as of this writing). I love how he just listens and loves. He doesn’t judge or push anyone away. He also truly mourns with community, especially those who felt they had no other choice but to end their lives. We can learn a lot from him.
After his address concluded, we had a closing prayer and then our host, Lyric, who was hugely instrumental in planning this event, asked all the LGBTQ+ individuals in the audience (who felt comfortable) to stand in a circle at the front and hold hands. And then she asked the rest of us to stand around them, encircling them with our love and support. It was a truly sacred moment as there were smiles and tears from many members of the group, inside and outside the circle.
Here is the final group photo from most of us who came (some had to leave early).
It was hard to leave this conference. There was a sheen of tears in my eyes, and a whole lot of love in my heart. It occurred to me that this must be what Zion must feel like. Everyone at the conference was truly “of one heart and one mind (Moses 7:18).” I thought about why it felt that way, and I think it’s because we were without judgment that day. We just saw each other as beloved children of God and we wanted to help each other feel loved, welcome, valued, and heard.
There are so many nuggets of wisdom that touched my heart at this wonderful Gather Conference. Allow me to share some of them. You may notice that these points mirror what my brother said in the video very well:
Meghan Decker shared that when you find out someone is LGBTQ+, you get to take what you know about the person and what you know about their sexual orientation/gender identity and make a choice to either change how you feel about the person or how you feel about their sexual orientation/gender identity. In my brother’s case, most people chose to change how they felt about him, leading only to pain.
Many LGBTQ+ individuals feel like they don’t belong. We must do better at building relationships with them, giving them a safe space, and listening to their experiences. One way to do that is to stop making LGBTQ+ people a taboo topic. If we don’t then fear, distrust, and disgust will continue to abound instead of compassion, empathy, and love. It is very painful for LGBTQ+ individuals to have to hide who they really are because they feel unsafe. If we cultivate a more inclusive environment at church, then people will feel safe sharing who they really are. When I think about this, my mind goes to David Buckner’s talk during this past General Conference. When I heard the talk the first time, this quote stuck out to me: “Do we warmly welcome all who come through the doors? Brothers and sisters, it is not enough to just sit in the pews. We must heed the Savior’s call to build higher and holier relationships with all of God’s children. We must live our faith!” The entire talk is amazing, and I encourage all members of the Church to listen to this talk through the lens of the LGBTQ+ community.
For those of us who are cisgender and heterosexual, we may never truly understand how someone can have a different sexual orientation or gender identity. What we can do is listen, believe, learn, love, and embrace. We don’t have to understand to do any of that. This community needs us to amplify their voices by involving them, lovingly correcting others who make insensitive comments, and talking about their realities so that others can also learn and change their hearts.
Worth and love aren’t earned but are unlimited gifts from God to all His children. Nothing can remove anyone from that love. Jesus invites all into His fold. So should we. To help us love better, we need to see our LGBTQ+ siblings as part of us, and not an “other” group. Remember that “[Jesus] inviteth them all to come unto him and partake of his goodness; and he denieth none that come unto him, black and white, bond and free, male and female; and he remembereth the heathen; and all are alike unto God, both Jew and Gentile (2 Nephi 26:33).”
When someone does come out to us, it takes a lot of courage and vulnerability. This should be a time for loving, listening, believing, and trusting. Too many people make light of their loved one’s experiences and feelings, only think about how the news will change their own lives, and even try to fix or change their loved one. The right thing to do is to be there for your loved one, meet them where they are, and trust them to receive their own personal revelation for their lives. Help them feel God’s love for them and internalize that this is how God created them. They have a divine purpose to fulfil on this earth just the way they are. Sometimes this news will change the dynamic of your home or relationship, but allow it to be a positive and creative experience as you make adjustments and new traditions.
One of the things we got in our swag bags at the conference was a bumper sticker and wristband that both say the word “Stonecatcher.” Elder Dale G. Renlund spoke of this concept in his General Conference talk from three years ago. Here is a portion of that talk (in this section he is quoting author Bryan Stevenson who wrote Just Mercy):
“…Mr. [Bryan] Stevenson observed that self-righteousness, fear, and anger have caused even Christians to hurl stones at people who stumble. He then said, ‘We can’t simply watch that happen,’ and he encouraged the congregants to become ‘stonecatchers.’ Brothers and sisters, not throwing stones is the first step in treating others with compassion. The second step is to try to catch stones thrown by others.
How we deal with advantages and disadvantages is part of life’s test. We will be judged not so much by what we say but by how we treat the vulnerable and disadvantaged. As Latter-day Saints, we seek to follow the Savior’s example, to go about doing good. We demonstrate our love for our neighbor by working to ensure the dignity of all Heavenly Father’s children.”
That is my ultimate purpose and prayer in writing this post: for all of us to become stonecatchers for the LGBTQ+ community, and for any other marginalized group of people. Please remember that every person, whether different from you or not, is equal to you in the sight of God. Every person laughs, cries, thinks, feels, make mistakes, and does good. Every person has unique quality traits that bless the lives of those they touch. I love every person I met at Gather Conference Southeast. I pray that all within the sound of my voice can feel such love in their lives.
My beloved Eve, you are one year old today. Mommy and Daddy couldn’t love you more. You have brought so much sunshine to our lives. You are our Sweetheart, our Princess.
Many parents call their daughters Princess. I actually vowed I would never call you that because it was so cliché and 2-dimensional. But then, as the months passed and I couldn’t come up with a name that suited you, you became Princess anyway.
It isn’t because I want you to have a beautiful voice like Ariel, or a gorgeous face like Aurora.
It isn’t because I want you to be artistic like Rapunzel or a master of the bow like Merida.
It isn’t because I want you to have magical adventures like Jasmine or find your handsome prince like Snow White.
No, this is not why I call you Princess.
Ariel was full of wonder and saw the beauty in everything.
Aurora was sweet and innocent.
Rapunzel was trusting and found joy in the journey.
Merida was completely comfortable with who she was.
Jasmine was forgiving to one who had deceived her.
Snow White was cheerful and had a strong connection with animals.
Anna had faith in her sister and didn’t give up on her.
Kiara saw the good in all lions, and wanted to unite them.
These are all wonderful qualities, but it isn’t why I call you Princess.
None of these princesses had perfect lives – they all had difficult trials to endure.
Ariel had her sea witch, and Aurora a cursed spinning wheel.
Rapunzel had a kidnapper who posed as her mother, and Merida a mother who she turned into a bear.
Jasmine nearly had to marry a wicked man, and Snow White was nearly killed by a poisoned apple.
Anna lost her parents, and almost lost her sister, and Kiara felt alone and untrusted by her father.
They all made it through their trials stronger and happier than before, but that isn’t why I call you Princess.
Most of these young princesses also had flaws, as we all do.
Ariel lacked common sense and sought help from a sea witch, and Aurora trusted and fell in love with a stranger.
Rapunzel was indecisive about being disobedient, and Merida was hot-headed enough to change her mother.
Jasmine was rude to anyone who she didn’t agree with, and Snow White was naïve and unaware.
Anna made a huge error in judgment, and Kiara snuck around.
We can learn from these princesses’ flaws, as they did, but that isn’t why I call you Princess.
Do you know why I call you princess?
It is because you are one. YOU are the daughter of a King, a Heavenly King.
His name is Heavenly Father. He is your father and mine, and the father of us all.
He knows you by name, and He loves you more than you could ever imagine.
He sent you to earth and to our family so that you can grow, learn, and choose to follow Him.
He will watch over you and send angels (earthly and heavenly) to assist you in your earthly journey.
I want you to always remember who you are. Being our daughter is something we hope you are always proud of, but more than that, we want you to truly feel that you are a spiritual young lady who has unlimited divine potential.
Your Heavenly Father has given you spiritual gifts that you can use to bless the lives of those around you. Even at your young age, we recognize some of them:
You are someone who makes people smile. Never stop doing that.
You love to share your food. Keep on sharing your abundance.
You are independent and try to be self-reliant. If you can help yourself, you can better help others.
You are funny, always making people laugh – this will help lighten heavy hearts over and over again.
You love yourself. If you can love yourself, you can love others even better.
Using these gifts, and more, with a loving heart, will bring you much happiness now and in the life to come.
My sweet daughter, Eve. You are named after our first mother. She was the first of God’s spirit daughters to come to this earth. She was the first princess. Follow her example of keeping the commandments. Just as she was chosen to live in the beginning, you have been chosen to live on earth at this time in this place for a reason.
We knew that you would be a very special little girl, and we were right. We know you have a divine mission to fulfill on this earth. Embrace it and know that your earthly and Heavenly parents will be with you through it all.
I started a blog because I felt that the Lord wanted me to share whatever experiences and wisdom and testimony I have for the betterment of others. I have felt Him guide my hand over and over again, and putting ideas into my mind and heart that I just knew I had to write down. A couple days ago, ideas started flowing into my brain, and continued to do so all day and all evening. Throughout the day, I emailed myself my little thoughts, around 30 times. Here is the message the Lord sent to me:
I believe with all my heart that we are all children of the most High God. We are brothers and sisters. We are born with goodness inside of us. We will make mistakes, but we can change through the atonement of Christ. We are heirs of the kingdom of God if we are worthy. This applies to all of us!
It even applies to the people we don’t like, the people we don’t agree with, the people whose actions we abhor, the people who care nothing about the sanctity of human life, born or unborn.
Because we are all God’s children, He loves us all. He loves us equally and individually, even when we don’t deserve it. Jesus Christ atoned for all of us. We are all given the opportunity to choose, to repent, and to change. No person who lives on this earth is denied these blessings, not even white supremacists or the President of the United States.
So, why do we hate each other so much? Why do we use so much energy in bringing each other down?
Why?
Does it bring change? Does it bring hope? Does it bring peace?
It feels natural, though, doesn’t it, to air our frustrations for all the world to see? Perhaps then, nobody can accuse us of being on the wrong side of the tracks, the wrong side of politics, the wrong side of religion, the wrong side of history.
I am no expert, but this doesn’t seem to be working. It seems that instead of our community, our country, our world becoming happier and more peaceful, it is becoming more corrupt, hateful, and wicked.
Who are our gods, meaning, who do we place the most faith in? Is it the media? Our friends? Facebook memes?
My friends, might I strongly suggest we move back to God. No, not everybody believes in God. Not everyone believes in Christ. But, regardless if you believe or not, the principles Christ taught, if followed, will bring peace and love back to this earth.
Let me tell you a story.
About 600 BC, there was a prophet named Lehi in Jerusalem. The people hated him and his preachings, because he told them that if they did not repent, Jerusalem would be destroyed. One night, he had a dream in which the Lord told him that he must gather his family and flee into the wilderness for their safety. Lehi obeyed, and took his family that very night, leaving behind his home and his riches. He had four sons at that time. Two of them, Nephi and Sam, loved their father dearly, believed he was truly a prophet, and followed his counsel. His other two sons, Laman and Lemuel, loathed their father. They murmured about having to leave their home, and they did not believe their father was inspired, but rather a mad man. They also hated their brother, Nephi, and often plotted and attempted to kill him, saying he thought he was superior over them, even though he was their younger brother. Each time they tried to kill Nephi, the Lord spared his life because of his faith. Going beyond natural reaction, Nephi always forgave his brothers and continued to teach them the gospel. Unfortunately, they did not want to understand. The family wandered in the wilderness for 8 years, until they finally reached the ocean. The Lord commanded Nephi to build a ship with his instructions so that they could sail to a promised land. Nephi obeyed, but once again, Laman and Lemuel taunted him and wanted to kill him again. Through the power of God, they were compelled to help build, along with the rest of the family. Once the ship was built, they sailed to the promised land, through the Lord’s direction. On the ship, they still did awful things. Their wickedness never stopped, regardless of the miracles they had seen and the blessings they had been given. Only when they saw that their families were going to die, did they stop and repent, and then the Lord led them the rest of the way. In the promised land, after their father, Lehi, died, Laman, Lemuel, and many members of their families plotted to kill all those who were righteous and followed Nephi. They decided to live by hate rather than trying to respect and understand those who were believed differently than them. Nephi was told by the Lord to flee with his people and settle somewhere else. They did. And thus there became two groups of people from the same family – the Nephites and the Lamanites. The Nephites had the truth and clung to it, while the Lamanites taught their children to hate the Nephites, proclaiming that there was no God, and lying about the truth (1 Nephi 1-2 Nephi 5).
Why did I tell you this story? Well, I did it to show the danger that comes from making assumptions about character, showing hate to others rather than love, plotting to kill or hurt others rather than trying to understand them, and holding grudges rather than forgiving. And I also did it to show that the opposite can happen – forgiving others who have grievously wronged us, and continuously shining light to others no matter how they treat us.
But, the story continues for centuries. Even though the Lamanites were generally a fearsome, dangerous, murderous people, not all of them remained that way. About 92 BC, there was a righteous Nephite king named Mosiah. He had four sons, and they had once been horrible influences, persecuting the church and those in it. But, through seeing an angel, they saw the light and repented of their sins. And then, they served many missions for the Lord. After years of serving, they decided that they wanted to preach to the Lamanites…
2 That perhaps they might bring them to the knowledge of the Lord their God, and convince them of the iniquity of their fathers; and that perhaps they might cure them of their hatred towards the Nephites, that they might also be brought to rejoice in the Lord their God, that they might become friendly to one another, and that there should be no more contentions in all the land which the Lord their God had given them.
3 Now they were desirous that salvation should be declared to every creature, for they could not bear that any human soul should perish; yea, even the very thoughts that any soul should endure endless torment did cause them to quake and tremble.
4 And thus did the Spirit of the Lord work upon them, for they were the very vilest of sinners. And the Lord saw fit in his infinite mercy to spare them; nevertheless they suffered much anguish of soul because of their iniquities, suffering much and fearing that they should be cast off forever. (Mosiah 28:2-4).
So, even though Aaron, Ammon, Omner and Himni, were the very vilest of sinners, they changed for the better. They became good men who wanted to do something nobody else would dare to do: bring truth, knowledge, friendship and rejoicing to the wicked Lamanites.
From their preaching, many of the Lamanites were converted to the gospel. Their hearts were changed and they wanted to do good and serve God the remainder of their lives. They even buried their weapons of war, covenanting with God never to shed blood again. Any time Lamanites accepted Christ, they stayed true their whole lives (Alma 24:19).
This is just one story of so many that shows how when people have a love of God and all people, have mercy, and a spirit of peace, miracles can happen.
These stories I told you are from a sacred scripture called The Book of Mormon. It is another testament of Jesus Christ, taking place in the ancient Americas.
About 82 BC, a man named Zeezrom was a devilish man, who tried to persuade a missionary of Christ, Amulek, to deny the existence of God with money. Amulek did not deny, but rather answered all of his questions and bore his testimony. Then Alma, the prophet, and missionary companion to Amulek, spoke to Zeezrom with power. They did not stand down, confessing what they knew to be the truth. And Zeezrom felt that power. Because of Zeezrom’s initial cries against them and their bold response, Alma and Amulek were imprisoned for a time by those angry at their words. They escaped their bonds with help from the Lord, and Zeezrom, meanwhile, lay ill with a high fever, sick with dread over what he had done. He asked to be healed, and through his new faith in Christ, he was. He was then baptized by Alma. (Alma 12-14).
So, this awful, evil man, ended up being a kind, good, righteous man.
Alma the Younger, from the story I just told, was best friends with the sons of Mosiah, and had been wicked just like them. His father prayed for him and continued to love him. Through an angelic visitor, and visions of Christ, he repented, and eventually became the high priest of the church (Mosiah 27).
Alma the Younger’s father, Alma, was not always righteous either. He was a priest of a wicked King named Noah. A prophet named Abinadi , around 148 BC, gave his life sharing the message of the gospel to the wicked king and his priests But it wasn’t in vain. Alma believed, and shared the gospel with many others, baptizing them in the name of Christ (Mosiah 17).
Around 62 BC, there was a Captain Moroni who hated shedding blood, and offered mercy whenever he could, even in the midst of war. He never forgot the humanity of his enemies, no matter how bloodthirsty they were (Alma 55:19).
Captain Moroni, though a wonderful, righteous man, was also sometimes harsh in his words, especially when he felt a sense of possible betrayal. He sent a very harsh epistle to the chief judge of the Nephites, Pahoran. Rather than being offended at the untrue accusations, Pahoran wrote back, “And now, in your epistle you have censured me, but it mattereth not; I am not angry, but do rejoice in the greatness of your heart” (Alma 61:9). We can all take example from the fact that he saw good in a situation where he could have easily been offended.
Mormon, a prophet and general towards the end of the Book of Mormon (around 360 AD), prayed for, loved, and led his people even though he wept over their wickedness. Once, he stopped leading them, but chose to lead them again later on. He never hated them or stopped praying for them no matter how wicked they became (Mormon 3). How interesting that the people who were once so righteous, became so wicked that the Lord allowed them to be destroyed?
These are just a few of so many stories in the Book of Mormon of good and evil, but it wasn’t as clear as it seemed. Those who had known the truth their whole lives often rebelled, and those who started out wicked, oftentimes were more receptive to light than those who had been raised that way. And then, there were those stories of hope – stories of those who had rebelled but then again returned to the light.
I have seen a meme floating around Facebook that says “Nobody is born racist.” That’s true, and nobody is born greedy, selfish, hateful, or violent either.
On the contrary, children are born innocent and pure, each with divine potential. Even the most evil people that have ever lived were once little children, free of sin.
Moroni, a prophet in the Book of Mormon (and son of the prophet Mormon), said:
…little children are alive in Christ, even from the foundation of the world (Moroni 8:12).
So, hate is learned. Racism is learned. Violence is learned. And for it to be learned, it must be taught.
Before Lehi died, he spoke to all of his grandchildren. To the children of his wicked son, Laman, he said:
Wherefore, if ye are cursed, behold, I leave my blessing upon you, that the cursing may be taken from you and be answered upon the heads of your parents. (2 Nephi 4:6).
When we see people murdering, plundering, and doing other wicked things, we want to hate them. We want them to get the justice they deserve and we don’t care what happens to them. But think of this: how did they get the way they are? If people aren’t born evil, how do they become that way?
They are taught, and those people were taught, and those people were taught. It is a vicious cycle.
Who had the original thought then?
Who started it all?
The answer to that is the only enemy we really should have, and that is Satan. Satan is the one who puts evil thoughts into our minds. He is the one who wants to tear societies and families apart. He knows that contention isn’t Godlike. He knows that violence isn’t Godlike. He knows that hateful words aren’t Godlike. He knows so well. And that is why he has power over us, because we react to hate the way he wants us to react – with more hate and divisiveness.
Not all of us do this, but too many do.
I have read so many Facebook posts that point fingers and say that if you are or aren’t doing something, you are part of the problem. I don’t like those posts, not because I fit the descriptions and am denying it, but because it is still pointing fingers. It is fighting hate with hate. It doesn’t feel good. It also is making generalizations, assumptions, and stereotypes – and it is dividing us as people.
We aren’t the left verses the right, liberals verses conservatives, religious verses nonreligious, black verses white. We are all people worthy of safety, prosperity, and joy.
We have to realize that:
None of us is exempt from being tempted or sinning.
Someone we love, or even us, could someday do something deplorable if we allow Satan to permeate our characters.
Brainwashing is real.
Are people who were fed untruths over and over again until they believed it was right, beyond repair, beyond forgiveness?
As hate is learned, it can also be unlearned.
Who is going to help them unlearn? It isn’t going to be the ones that taught them to hate.
Hate is there, and it is scary. Every day the headlines blow our minds with the things people think are acceptable. Should we give in to hate? Should we allow it to consume us all?
I have been taught my whole life that The Book of Mormon was written for our day, and looking at the stories the way I did in this post, brought me a renewed clarity that it really was.
We will not let hate prevail (by not hating those it would be so easy and justifiable to hate). We will not let Satan win. We will not allow ourselves to be sucked into Satan’s lies. I believe with all of my heart that if we…
Look for the good in others (even those with whom we dislike or disagree);
Love, serve and pray for our enemies as Christ commanded us to (3 Nephi 12:44);
This can be very difficult, but if we pray for their hearts to be softened, for them to see the truth, and for understanding to come to them and to us, miracles can happen.
Are peacemakers and turn the other cheek, rather than seek revenge (3 Ne. 12:9, 39);
Forgive others for what they do to us, and for what they have done in the past to us or other people. This shows we know they can change, and don’t forever judge them on their pasts;
It always humbles me to remember that Christ asked His father to forgive those who crucified him. (3 Ne. 13:15, Luke 23:34).
Show compassion even when someone doesn’t deserve it -this is mercy (3 Nephi 12:7);
We should also remember to show compassion to those affected by acts of wickedness.
Live in meekness, meaning goodness and kindness. We will shine a light to the world through our good example and service (Matthew 5:16);
Teach our children to love the Lord and all their neighbors, regardless of color, religion, social status, sexual orientation, etc. (Isaiah 54:13);
And then live that way as well.
Spend time with people we aren’t like and care to find out what is important to them;
Care about others’ struggles and don’t minimize them, even if we don’t experience them ourselves;
Ask people to help us with our struggles, even if we don’t think they will understand. This is how they can understand;
As an example, many minorities feel threatened by #WhitePrivilege. White people may not understand what they mean, so they should tell them what they are feeling and what they have experienced. And in return, though white people may not empathize on a racial level, minorities will probably find white people can empathize because of other factors. Whites are not defined just by their race – nobody is. Most of us encounter some kind of prejudice in our lives that brings heartache and sorrow.
Self-reflect often and ask ourselves if our actions are leading us to be better people and inspiring others to be better too;
Choose not to judge others for things they cannot control, such as the color of their skin;
Are slow to anger and slow to be offended;
People are always going to be angry about something. Stand above it and seek for understanding.
Denounce sin but don’t equate the sinner with the sin;
See everyone as an individual with a story, rather than judging everyone in a group the same way;
There are outside pressures, and some people are looking for truth, but just don’t know where to find it (Doctrine and Covenants 123:12).
Also be careful not to judge a group by one person who may not represent the beliefs of said group.
Recognize that there is more good in the world than evil, and embrace the good;
Try to change hearts with love rather than force change through hate;
Care about the salvation of all people, even the wicked, like Ammon and his brothers did;
Before acting, think about how we would feel if someone did or said the same thing we are thinking about to us;
Are grateful for the freedoms of our great land, and realize that freedom belongs to everyone, even those we disagree with.
….then we will be a part of the solution. We can’t control what others do, but we can and should definitely control what we do. With that control, great things can come to pass.
Please remember, my friends that hate + hate does not equal change, hate + hate does not equal love, and hate + hate does not equal peace. Hate can only be overcome by love, and perfect love casteth out all fear.
There are a lot of things that set my church, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, apart from other churches. One big one is that our church congregations are run by its members. We do not hire our spiritual leaders, teachers, choristers, custodians, pianists, etc. The members are asked to, or called, to do these responsibilities for a time. These callings are given through inspiration, and as members, we are given the opportunity to accept those calls.
In December 2014, I was called to be the Primary Secretary in my ward (congregation). Primary is the organization for children in my church. We have a Nursery program for ages 18 months to 3, and then the official Primary program for ages 3-11.
When I first was extended the call, I admit I wasn’t excited. I had done this calling before in another ward, and it was mostly paperwork and organizational stuff. But, I accepted the calling out of obedience, and a willingness to serve in whatever way I could.
Fast forward to September 18, 2016, the day I, and the rest of the Primary presidency of my ward, got released from our duties. It was the day of our yearly Primary Program, where the children ages 3-11 get up in front of our congregation to sing songs they have learned all year, and present speaking parts about spiritual topics also learned that year. The day of the Primary Program is one of my favorite Sundays each year, and this past one was extra special because it would be my last one in the presidency.
I was so proud of the children, and my love for them spilled out through my tears. I couldn’t hold back the emotion that day as I was released. I sat quietly during my last Sunday in the Primary room with them, sad I would be leaving them, and that I wouldn’t be able to teach them anymore.
In the past year and nine months, I have learned so much from these wonderful Primary children, and from serving as Primary Secretary. It is a calling I am so grateful I had because, not only was I able to assist in keeping our Primary dealings organized, I was able to collaborate with the other sisters in my presidency on many issues, like activities, callings, and needs of children. I was also able to teach the children periodically (my favorite part), sing the songs with them, and just get to know and love each child.
Here are some of the things I admire about the Mebane Ward Primary children:
They are helpful. When something falls, or there are chairs to be put away, there are kids always willing to lend a hand.
They love to participate. Some of the kids would come to me asking, sometimes practically begging, to say a prayer, recite a scripture, or give a talk. Others would get upset if not asked to participate enough as sticks were pulled out of the bucket to choose helpers.
They like to tell stories about their lives – and usually those stories correlate with the lesson. I loved hearing about the kids’ missionary, service, or family experiences. They often brought tears to my eyes.
They are loving and compassionate. One little boy always wanted to give me a hug each week. I always looked forward to those hugs and his sweet voice. I can think of a couple times, too, where I got emotional in Primary after teaching a lesson and bearing my testimony. There would inevitably be kids who wanted to make sure I was okay, and I loved them even more than I already had before.
They work well in competitive scenarios. Once, I was substituting as chorister, and the kids were singing very quietly. I told them that I could hear myself over all of them. I admitted I sing loud, but with that big group, they should have been able to at least sing as loud as me. And you know what? They rose to the challenge and sang their little hearts out. After that time, I often reminded them they could sing as loud as Sister Al-Bjaly.
They have a hard time sitting still and staying quiet sometimes. Why did I admire this? Well, in the moment, maybe I didn’t. But, it helped me gain some understanding and patience as I realized that these are good kids – it is just really hard to stay reverent for three hours at church. It brought perspective as I thought about adults who can’t sit still or stay quiet that long either. For all we expect of them, they really do a fine job.
They try even when they are afraid. My heart melted over and over seeing the little ones get up, sometimes for the first time, to the podium to deliver their talks, prayers or scriptures. Sometimes, they wouldn’t say a word, but would lean on their parents for support. Even when their parents would say their part for them, I was so proud of them just for getting up there. I know adults who won’t give talks or prayers in church, but these little ones will at least get up and try.
They find joy in singing. Well, maybe not all of them, but most of those kids really open up through song. They haven’t gotten to an age yet where their singing voices embarrass them, and they think they aren’t good enough to sing. No, regardless of singing talent or even knowing the words, most of the kids sing, sing, sing. And I love it!
They have good parents who teach them the gospel of Christ. This was incredibly apparent to me, especially as I taught lessons. I was amazed at how knowledgeable the kids were about the scriptures and their heroes, how many answers they knew without thinking, and how many spiritual experiences they recognized in their lives and in the lives of their families.
They feel and recognize the Holy Ghost. Even though there were definitely some days where the kids were loud and seemingly out of control, sometimes they would hush. They would become contemplative. They would get serene looks on their faces. I recall more than once at the end of a lesson (sharing time) or singing time, the kids would be uncharacteristically quiet. It was a beautiful noise, because it accompanied feelings of God’s love and peace. One time, (I think it was the last time I taught them), I ended my lesson by singing a duet of I’m Trying to Be Like Jesus with one of our talented young 10-year-old ladies. I felt the Spirit as I sang with her, and as we finished, you could hear a pin drop. It wasn’t necessarily our voices, but the praises we sang, that helped the children feel that Jesus really does love them, and that we can all be like Him.
I just love Primary. I felt Heavenly Father’s and Jesus’s love for them and for me over and over again as I sat and watched them, helped them, taught them, or sang with them. It has been hard the last few weeks not being with them, but I know the Lord has another responsibility waiting for me. I will do my best to fulfill whatever it is, for I know it will be for my spiritual good.
Thank you, dear Mebane Ward Primary children, for all you have done for me! You are special children of God!
Casey, you are 11 years old now, and as I have observed your actions lately with admiration, I wish to honor you with a tribute.
Are you always the perfect son? No, but I am not always the perfect mother, and nobody’s perfect. You and I both know where we need to improve, but that isn’t what a tribute is for. I wish to highlight and acknowledge your deeds and accomplishments so I can show you my gratitude, admiration and love.
One thing that I love about you, Casey, is that if I need you, you are there. You don’t complain when I ask you to help with your brothers, or with cleaning, or with dinner. You do it, and you do it the best way you know how. I can’t express to you how much I need this from you, and appreciate it.
I am not a perfect mother, Casey. You know that, but whether it is picking you up from school late because I forgot it was early release day, or raising my voice when I shouldn’t, or getting overly irritated with you, you love me anyway. You don’t scold me or get angry with me. You are understanding, and express that you know I have a lot on my plate, or that you understand that being a parent it hard. Thank you for loving me.
You are a service-oriented boy too. When I suggest you write a note to someone, or make a craft, you do it willingly, and from the heart. As of late, you have even written me cards as an apology for something you did, or as a way to cheer me up. I cherish those cards, and will always keep them. You are willing to use your own money to buy gifts for family members too, and you carefully choose those gifts. What a thoughtful boy you are.
I love seeing you develop your talents, skills and interests. I can’t tell you how much it pleases me to see how much you love what I love – instruments, singing, baking, acting. The first few months of the year, we worked on our second musical together, and you asked me to help you learn the ensemble songs so you could sing in the background. You were responsible and made sure you were on stage at the right time, and you did your best with your parts.
You took part in a theater club this year too, and as one of your teachers, I was always impressed with your willingness to try anything. You gave your all to everything, from games, to improvisations, to singing. At our performance showcase, you sang “Out There” from The Hunchback of Notre Dame beautifully. It isn’t an easy song, but you made sure to analyze your character and try to show what he was feeling. Tears came to my eyes when you sang.
This year as you learned a new instrument, the trombone, you always wanted to play songs for me, and you impressed me with your skills at your band concert.
You also did your best to memorize and perform “The Star Spangled Banner” for a group number at a recent Durham Bulls game. It made me smile to hear you practicing around the house, and I loved helping you practice too. Just a few days ago, you wanted to help me bake your birthday cake – you always want to help me bake. And going back to your service-oriented heart, you melted mine when you told me you set out the ingredients for me to make the icing. When I came downstairs later, I saw the ingredients lovingly laid out, and I smiled with adoration.
Your spirituality strengthens my testimony. I always tear up when you bear your testimony in church. When your teachers tell me how much you know about the scriptures, I am so proud of you, and I know it is true. Each night when we read together as family, you have comments and questions. You pay attention and want to learn. I can’t tell you how proud I have been of you lately as you have also begun to do personal scripture study before bed. I love it when you come to me and report what you have read. You will be a wonderful missionary someday – no, you already are.
School has always been a place you have excelled. I haven’t had to get on you about doing your homework or projects. You have your weaknesses in school, but overall, you are a good friend, someone your teachers love to have in class, and a really hard worker. Your final report card and EOG scores impressed me so much. You are a smart boy, but it isn’t just smarts that bring good grades. Dedication, motivation, high standards for yourself, team work, honesty, and humility are key elements too.
On the last day of school, you presented a project on homelessness in North Carolina at the Orange County Library. You clearly did your research, and your concern for the homeless was evident. You really want to help them.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rkgZ10uq_gU
After school when you told me you want to help in soup kitchens, and really hold true to your word to help, you brought tears to my eyes. And when you said you wanted to use the money you would have received for your good grades to help the homeless, I was once again in awe of the goodness of your heart.
How wonderful is it that you love projects too, especially when you get to spend time with your dad or me. I love how you want to help in the garden, paint, or assist with other projects. Just this past Saturday, you jumped at the chance to help me build a bathroom cabinet. It was such a fun experience to spend time together, make mistakes together, and then fix them together. You have an eye for building, and your observations were right on. The finished product was awesome, and it is because you were building it with me.
And finally, Casey, you are one affectionate young man. Your hugs, kisses and soft words can really calm a person. You know what gentleness brings peace, something that many people do not realize.
Casey, I am so blessed to be your mother. Heavenly Father knew I needed you when I needed you, and you will always be one of the most special people in my life. I love you, my dear son.
Remember how we won a trip to Disney World? Well, February 29-March 6, 2016 was the week we got to visit the Happiest Place on Earth. Here is how it all went down:
Monday – Traveling to Orlando!
Riding the shuttle to the airport.
The magic started early – right after we checked our bags, in fact. As we turned around to ride the escalator to security, we saw my Dad taking a walk. He had no idea when we would be at the airport, and normally did not walk that part of the airport while at work. It was a very special and tender surprise to be able to see him before we left.
We all passed through security without a second glance, except our dear diaper bag. It had to be investigated. Upon a thorough inspection, it was clear to go to our gate.
While we waited to board, we wondered who else in the crowd was also going on an all-expense paid trip through My Computer Career.
When we finally boarded the plane, we decided that Casey would sit next to Rigel, and Jad, Kamren and I , would sit in the row behind. It seemed like a good idea, until Jad and I got sad that we couldn’t see Rigel’s reaction when he flew for the first time. I squeezed his hand through the seat and asked how he was. “I’m fine, Mom,” he reassured me. No fear whatsoever.
Rigel drew a picture of the plane.
Orlando, FL Airport
The flight wasn’t long, and for the most part, everyone was good. The Florida airport was huge. Our next stop was to take the Magical Disney bus to our resort – Disney Boardwalk Inn.
Even the ride there was fun for the kids. Kamren was running all around the bus, and Rigel and Casey liked looking out the window. I got into a conversation with the other family who won the video contest from Raleigh. They gave us some nice tips.
We finally got to our resort, and it was gorgeous. I was so excited to go in. My mouth opened wide when I saw the fabulous couch and carousel model when we first walked in. How gorgeous.
It took us a while to find our room, but when we did, the kids found solace in the soft beds. They were tired. Our bags weren’t delivered yet, so we decided to go get our first snacks on our meal plan and explore before the scheduled dinner that night.
The snacks were fab. Look at that rice krispie treat. We sat happily outside, overlooking the lake. Then we decided to walk the boardwalk. Casey thought it was boring, until we spotted a pair of mallard ducks. It was so fun to be so close to them. Another male mallard flew in, and started to fight with the other – over the girl, perhaps? It was fun to speculate.
After a little more exploring, we relaxed for a while, and then got freshened up to eat dinner. We met in a large ballroom where there were gorgeous tables set up. I was amazed at how many families were on this MyCC trip throughout the country. Tony Galati, the CEO of MyCC, and his daughter, Melanie, were delightful. It amazes me how down to earth all of the executives of MyCC were.
We had a very nice meal that night. Unfortunately, the kids barely ate a roll each, and found it very difficult to sit still. But, it was worth it. We got a packet of info for our trip, and also a surprise $200 gift card to spend at Disney. You should have seen our faces light up.
After the dinner was over, we had to take the kids to get food. We found a pizza place on the Boardwalk. It was really yummy, actually. Jad even fed a duck:
After watching a fun street performer, who made kazoo noises instead of spoke, we retired to our room to unpack and get ready for bed. We were really excited for Epcot the next day.
Tuesday
One thing that was really cool about our resort is that it was within walking distance to Epcot and Hollywood Studios. Even cooler is that we could also ride a ferry yacht to the parks. So, that morning, around 9, we took our first ride on the water. The kids loved it.
We arrived at Epcot and had no idea how to get around. Luckily, we recognized some people from MyCC, and followed them to our character breakfast at the Garden Grill. We had to wait a little bit to get in, but it was worth it! The food was amazing. They brought us drinks first (I got a pomegranate lemonade –nom), and then this moist, delicious pan of cinnamon rolls. Next, we got a platter of American breakfast food, like bacon, eggs, ham, and the best breakfast potatoes I have ever had. We left that restaurant full, and with pictures of us with Mickey, Pluto, and Chip.
Our first ride at Epcot, and at Disney World, was Living with the Land. It wasn’t particularly exciting, but it was interesting. The crops grown were absolutely gorgeous, and I wanted to eat some fruits and vegetables right then.
We did a few rides that morning, such as Mission: Space, which was Rigel’s favorite ride of the trip. I rode the more intense version with Casey (I couldn’t breathe), and Rigel with the less intense with Jad. If you have to do the swap thing with kids, this ride is perfect for that, because as you exit the ride, there is an Advanced Training Lab, that Casey did, and a little indoor playground, which kept Kamren occupied. Win win!
By noon, we had to walk really fast back to our hotel to do a “Tell Us Your Story” video interview. I was a little apprehensive about being videotaped after sweating, I mean glistening, all morning. I also figured the kids would be crazy, and they were. There was yelling, and slamming, and licking of mirrors. But, the interviewer and videographer were really down to earth and kind. It was a fun experience to hear Jad get excited about answering questions about his school experience and life, and also to answer questions myself.
After that was over, we quickly walked back to Epcot to catch our lunch reservation at Teppan Edo. It is a Japanese restaurant where the food is cooked in an entertaining way right in front of you. I had heard it was a great restaurant for kids. Yeah, it wasn’t. The kids didn’t like the food. Jad and I did like the food a lot, but I would not recommend it for picky children. The silver lining was that the vanilla ice cream was to die for.
We shopped at a Japanese store after eating, where Rigel got his first souvenir – a Sonic the Hedgehog toy. He was insistent. I thought of my Nana when there, so I called her and asked her what she might like. She wanted a hanky.
We tried to browse the rest of the countries after that, amidst the kids’ complaining. We got some cute pictures, and even went to a German Werthers shop to get some rich caramel treats. Kamren had requested popcorn, and got it.
There weren’t many rides in the World Showcase, but we did find one: Gran Fiesta Tour. It was a pretty cool boat ride and fun. The best part was riding on the water next to a huge volcano. I had tried earlier to get a reservation at the restaurant with the volcano, but couldn’t. I was thrilled there was a ride that brought me to the same location.
Since the kids weren’t too impressed with the countries, we went back to Future World.
Look at these adorable pictures at the large fountain that sprayed water. I think that may have been the cutest part of the day for me.
My very favorite ride at Epcot, and one of my favorite rides of the whole trip, was Spaceship Earth. That ride takes you up inside the Epcot geosphere. You are taken through time to explore the history of communication. The ride made me cry. I could feel God’s hand in all aspects of history that we passed through, and I felt so grateful to be a part of this wonderful world.
Other rides/attractions we did were:
Journey into Imagination with Figment – It wasn’t that great – air did blow in our faces once…
Innoventions – There were a few cool things to do in there, like the Sum of all Thrills ride. Casey and I waited in line to do that. Casey took charge, and chose the intensity and movements we would experience when sitting in a machine closed over our bodies. It actually wasn’t that fun, so really, if you skip the Innoventions building, you won’t be missing anything.
Ellen’s Energy Adventure – This was funny because Ellen DeGeneres was in it, but it definitely more of an educational experience – better for older kids.
Disney & Pixar Short Film Festival – This is a must see. The videos were either hilarious or touching, and the 3D effects were phenomenal.
After the film festival attraction, we rushed back to the World Showcase to get some food and watch Illuminations, the nighttime firework, water and light show at Epcot. We got a fabulous meal at La Cantina de San Angel in Mexico. The food was authentic, and Jad was super impressed. Kamren slept through it.
The light show began while we were still getting our food. We couldn’t see the whole thing, but from what we could see, it was lovely. The music was entrancing, and the colors were spell-binding. It was really well done.
After the show, we walked back, caught a glimpse of Baymax on the way, and got excited for our next day!!!
Wednesday – Magic Kingdom
We got up super early Wednesday morning to catch the bus to Magic Kingdom. We arrived before the 8:30AM opening ceremonies. While we waited, we were able to talk to people from MyComputerCareer. It was nice getting to know others in our group.
Finally, the opening ceremonies began. When the train came in that held so many beloved Disney characters, I got teary-eyed. Disney has a way of doing that to you.
Once it was over, we waited a while to get a group pic with the rest of our group, and then we entered the Magic Kingdom! My first thought when entering was, “Wow!”
Cinderella’s castle was breathtakingly gorgeous, and the whole place was charming and beautiful. We were greeted by people all along the sidewalks. I knew I was going to love this place.
Our first stop was the Crystal Palace, where I made a last minute breakfast reservation. I am so glad we went. The buffet was incredible. Everything you could ever want for breakfast was there, from healthy to super sweet. Not only that, the kids got to meet characters from Winnie the Pooh. What an enjoyable meal!!!
One thing I loved about Magic Kingdom was how there were several lands, and all we easy to get to. We started out at Frontierland. The first thing we did was ride a raft to go to Tom Sawyer Island. That was actually really cute, and the kids loved running around and exploring.
Next was Splash Mountain. I will be honest – some of it was fun (the parts where we got wet), but a lot of the ride we were floating slowly in our boat, looking at scenes with Brer Rabbit, Brer Fox, and Brer Bear. I rode it first with Casey and Rigel, and then Jad rode it with them. Unfortunately, Kamren ended up being too short. It was so cute – he got in originally, but as we approached the ride, the attendant asked that he be measured again. Kamren stepped on his tippy toes to read the wood. It was adorable.
He was so good while we waited for Jad and the other kids. He liked to experiment with the magic band by scanning pictures.
Big Thunder Mountain Railroad was fun (I rode with Rigel, and Jad rode with Casey after). Rigel was a little scared, but it was a pretty mild roller coaster, actually.
We shopped at one of the gift shops (it was huge and had tons of stuff), and then hopped on the train. Kamren was super excited to ride the “Choo Choo,” so we rode it for him. We met an LDS family from Texas on that train ride. They were delightful people.
After we rode around the park on the train, we headed to Liberty Square. The riverboat was beautiful, but we didn’t ride it. Instead, we got in line for The Haunted Mansion. The line was fairly long, but that was okay because the closer you got to the mansion, the more stuff there was to touch and look at. The kids loved it – I would actually say the line went too fast for us to enjoy it fully. Unfortunately, when we got inside the mansion, we ended up standing really close to everyone in a hot room, waiting forever to get on the ride because it wasn’t working. When we got to a point where we all thought we would die, the ride finally started up again.
I must say, the Haunted Mansion was super cool. Rigel was my partner, and he was freaked out the whole time, but it was a silly kind of scary. It was very well done!
We headed over to Fantasyland after that to grab some lunch at Pinocchio’s Haus. The food was good, and it was a cute little set up.
After lunch, we had a little mishap. Kamren punched Rigel and he got a bloody nose. That was fun to clean up. He was fine, but wow, it was bloody.
There was tons to do in Fantasyland, and we wish we could have done it all. We didn’t stand in line to see any of the characters, but we did see glimpses of some.
And other than catching a small part of a parade, here is what we did do, not necessarily in order:
Under the Sea – Journey of The Little Mermaid – This was my favorite thing in Fantasyland. Seeing Eric’s castle up close, and then riding in a clam shell, reliving Ariel’s experiences, was breathtaking. For some reason, this one wasn’t just a slow boat ride for me. It brought back happy memories from my childhood.
Prince Charming Regal Carousel – This was just like any carousel, but it is always fun. Kamren didn’t want to get off.
Mickey’s Philhar Magic – This was so much fun! It was a 3D video and was hilarious. Some of my favorite attractions in all the parks were the 3D videos because cool things happen like water raining on you, or air blowing in your face. They are really interactive and fun.
We took a detour to Tomorrowland, and did the Tomorrowland Speedway, which was so much fun. I rode with Kamren and let him drive (don’t worry – you can’t veer off course), and it was a little crazy moving back and forth all the time. He had a blast, though. Jad let Rigel drive, and he kept bumping us. Casey rode on his own, and was thrilled.
Mad Tea Party – This was the traditional tea cup ride. My kids loved it, and Kamren didn’t want to get off.
It’s a Small World – This was one of my favorite rides because, even though it was yet another slow boat ride, it highlighted different people and cultures from around the world. I loved looking for Arabic people because it made me feel closer to Jad. It just helped me appreciate and have a greater love for the beauty and wonder each country of the world brings.
Peter Pan’s Flight – This was like all the rest of the boat rides, except you were suspended in the air on a slow ride. It was pretty cool. It takes you through the story of Peter Pan through life-like mannequins. I was so impressed by all the moving mannequins at Disney World. They were so lifelike.
After Fantasyland, we went back to Tomorrowland, and this is what we did:
Astro Orbiter – So, we were really excited about this one because you ride up an elevator, and get in these spaceships that fly in a circle high above the park. Casey got his own, Jad rode with Kamren, and I rode with Rigel, Let me tell you, I was scared to death. There is one big seat belt that holds both of you in (the littlest person rides in front of the bigger person). There is nothing to hold on to if you are the one in the back. Rigel was “steering,” and nearly the whole ride, we were slanted down right. I felt like I was going to fall out! I was so glad to be back on the ground when it was done. The kids loved it, though!
Buzz Lightyear’s Space Ranger Spin – This ride was really fun. You have guns and you are supposed to shoot the aliens in different rooms. You can spin your seats around whenever you want, and the colors and sounds are exciting.
Monster, Inc. Laugh Floor – This show was a riot. A large part of it is done live. Mike is there, and different monsters are supposed to help make us laugh enough to fill this huge canister. Well, the other monsters were computer animated on screen, but were acted by live people, and random audience members were chosen to do certain things, like dance. It was hilarious. I am kind of glad I wasn’t chosen, but appreciated those who were and had fun with it.
We also got to see Buzz Lightyear from a distance, and saw Mr. and Mrs. Incredible at a dance party right by Space Mountain (we didn’t ride that because of the lines and a bad attitude from our 10-year-old).
For dinner, we got hot dogs for the little ones at a little place by the Astro Orbiter. (After we got back that night, Jad went to a restaurant on the Boardwalk called ESPN Club, and got food for the rest of us. It was fab.)
I think the most magical part of our day at Magic Kingdom was the Celebrate the Magic show. Cinderella’s castle was lit up with Disney characters while lovely music played. I got teary-eyed during the Frozen part. Gosh, I don’t even like that movie much – why does it make me cry? 😉
After the show was over, it was really hard to get out of there, but we finally did, and caught the bus home.
Kamren was wiped out by the time we got back! What a fun day at Magic Kingdom!!!
Thursday – Hollywood Studios
We didn’t have to rush out that morning, so we were a little lazier, and ordered room service. The food was good, but not the best ever. Kamren took some of my food, so I took his. Our biggest memory of that breakfast will always be how much butter they gave us. I think they gave us an entire stick. Not sure what we needed all that for!
After breakfast, we walked over to Hollywood Studios. It was a little bit of a ways out, but we made it. My first reaction to it, was that it wasn’t very pretty. It looked old and outdated in its faded baby blue paint. It was quite disappointing in comparison to Magic Kingdom. Luckily, the rides and attractions were 1000 times better than the looks of the park would suggest.
Our first stop was the For the First Time in Forever: A Frozen Sing-Along Celebration. Casey and Rigel complained about being there, and I explained to them that some things are for Mommy to enjoy. Well, by the end, those kids were all completely mesmerized. Don’t judge me when I say that was my favorite show of the entire week at Disney World. It wasn’t just a sing-along. It was a hilarious retelling of the story by two Arendelle historians. They were perfect in every way, and Anna, Kristoff, and Elsa were all in it. Elsa came out at the end, and we all sang a fabulous reprise of Let it Go. As we sang, snow fell onto our heads. I am pretty sure I cried. It must be that song!
It was the perfect start to a wonderful day. Hollywood Studios is a smaller park, so we got to do a lot of it! Here is what else we did:
Star Wars: Path of the Jedi – This was fun because it took you through all the movies, even the newest, to tell the story of the Jedi. I loved it, and the kids definitely did. There is something so nostalgic about Star Wars.
A costume from Brigadoon. So cool!
The Great Movie Ride – This ride made me happy. Even while waiting in line, we had fun because they were playing scenes from old movies. And even though it was another slow ride, it was so amazing to see sets and moving mannequin characters from movies I grew up with, like Mary Poppins and The Wizard of Oz. There was even a real person dressed as a gangster who took over our ride. It was pretty cool.
Indiana Jones: Epic Stunt Spectacular – This was so cool! They asked for people to volunteer to be extras in the beginning. I didn’t volunteer, and I was sad I didn’t, because they got to interact with the stunt actors as they did three major scenes from Raiders of the Lost Ark. This was so fun to watch, and some of the stunts are awesome!
Lights, Motors, Action! Extreme Stunt Show – This was another really cool show. We sat towards the back and could still see fine. Seeing cars do incredible stunts was more fun for Jad and Casey, but I still thought it was cool. They even had a car that was built to look like it was driving backwards, but it was really driving forwards.
Muppet Vision 3D – This was not my favorite 3D show. It was almost too cheesy, but it was cool to have the old sarcastic men up in a balcony laughing at the Muppets. The gift shop outside of it was also cool – worth going to if you love Muppets stuff.
Toy Story Midway Mania – This is the most popular ride at Hollywood Studios. After riding it, though, I say it isn’t worth the line. We had fast passes, and still had a long line. It wasn’t any better than the Buzz Lightyear ride at Magic Kingdom. In fact, the Buzz ride as more fun. Skip this ride – it really isn’t that fun. It is basically a life-size video game.
While we waited for Daddy and Casey to ride the same ride, Rigel and I walked around. He was mesmerized by this poster.
Star Tours – The Adventures Continue – This ride was awesome!! Rigel and Jad rode it together first, and while I waited with the other boys, we viewed a light saber show with kids right next to it. Then, I went to the restaurant next door to grab some food for hungry Kamren. By the time I got the food, and Jad and Rigel got out of the ride, it was time to meet our group for the Fantasmic show and dessert party. Casey and I rode it after the show was over. C3PO is with us as we go on a mission in space that he wasn’t expecting to go on. The ride was really bumpy with really cool graphics. It was almost like were in Space.
And just walking around Hollywood Studio was fun!
Now, let me tell you about the food we had that day before I tell you about Fantasmic.
For lunch, we went to a place called 50s Prime Time Café. It was set up, obviously, like a 50s home. The waiters were all supposed to act moody, and impatient, finding pleasure in yelling at guests.
We had the best waiter. He had this really nasally voice, and when he yelled, we couldn’t help but giggle. Jad ate this up, and deliberately did things to get yelled at for.
The food was really good. If you like home cooking, this restaurant is for you. I don’t like fried chicken much, but they had the best fried chicken ever! All the food was good, and they served huge milkshakes. Mine was raspberry white chocolate, and was a special, so it wasn’t quite as big, but boy was it amazingly tasty.
After we ate, a lady let the kids play with hula hoops outside the restaurant.
For dinner, as I said, we ate at a restaurant right next to Star Tours. Let me rephrase that – we wolfed down as much of our dinner as possible before running to our meeting place for Fantasmic.
A guide took us this weird Employees Only back way to the outdoor auditorium. We felt a little naughty going that way. We sat at a table, and even though we were stuffed from dinner, we got ice cream, punch and cookies.
The show finally started, and it was pretty good. It wasn’t my favorite light/music/fireworks show, but it has a lot of Disney characters in it. The first part was Pocahontas and the song Savages. Towards the end of the show, there were images of Disney villains in the water. The dragon from Sleeping Beauty was also there. It really was a pretty cool show.
After Fantasmic was over, and after we got free t-shirts from the school, Casey and I ran to Star Tours, while Jad took the little boys to the huge gift shop next to it. The kids all got something. Casey really wanted to build a light saber, so he did. Then Kamren also wanted one, so Casey helped him build one – it ended up being a double light saber. Rigel had gotten a large Storm Trooper toy, but after I reminded him of another toy he had seen at another gift shop – Mickey and friends dressed up as Star Wars characters – he decided to return it and wait to get that toy.
Unfortunately, the gift shop with that toy was closed, so we walked around to other shops. We couldn’t find it, and I was getting frustrated I couldn’t find anything for myself. I figured out of all parks, this park would be the place to buy something. Oh well.
At least the boys had fun playing with light sabers in the street.
We took the ferry yacht back to the resort.
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When we were walking back to our room, we saw a street performer on the Boardwalk and had to stop. Casey got to help him. It was hilarious!
Friday – Animal Kingdom
This was our last park, and though we were excited, the kids were pretty tired. The bus ride felt long, and when we first got there, the kids were ready to be carried. We prayed that the kids would be good!
Our first stop was breakfast at the Rainforest Café. If you ever go there, realize that it is located before you enter the park. We didn’t realize that, so we entered the park and promptly exited. It was a pretty cool restaurant. There were moving elephant mannequins. The ceiling had hanging vines. There were fish tanks in the back. Every few minutes, there would be a thunderstorm and monkeys would make noises. The food was not the best I had ever had, but it was good nonetheless. The gift shop was really neat too.
Animal Kingdom doesn’t stay open as long as the other parks, but that ended up being okay because it is also a smaller park. We did almost everything.
When you first walk in, you see a huge tree, called the tree of life. It was breathtaking.
Much of the park consisted of trails and animal sightings, like a zoo. Here is what we did:
Discovery Island Trails – The lemurs were the kids’ favorite.
Pangani Forest Exploration Trail – Of note, we saw meercats and gorillas.
Kilimanjaro Safaris – This was the coolest part of Animal Kingdom by far, and can’t be missed. You ride in a safari truck through a setting that looks exactly like Africa, and you continuously come across beloved African animals. We had a blast.
Festival of the Lion King – I was disappointed in this show. I expected it to be a retelling of the movie, but it wasn’t. It was a performance that the animals were putting on for King Simba. Only Timon was “real.” The rest of the animals were puppets. There were really talented acrobats, which was the only cool part. Skip this one if you don’t have time to do it.
Maharajah Jungle Trek – This was the Asian portion of the park. It was beautiful. There were humongous fruit bats, and even a tiger.
Expedition Everest (Roller coaster) – This was the scariest, most exciting roller coaster we rode in Disney World. If you love a thrill, this is it! Rigel was scared, but enjoyed it.
Finding Nemo – The Musical – This was my favorite part of the day. It was a mini-musical, so wasn’t overly long for children. The kids and I were mesmerized. The acting, music, set, and props were wonderful. I highly recommend this.
TriceraTop Spin – This was a little kid ride. Both Kamren and Rigel loved it.
Primeval Whirl – Only Casey and I rode this one. It was fun, but not scary at all. You got whirled and jerked around, and were sometimes high up. It was worth doing with a short line.
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Dinosaur – This ride was really fun. Jad and Rigel rode it together, and then Casey and I did. Jad didn’t love it, and Rigel was scared of it. I personally thought it was awesome, and so did Casey. The concept was really cool, and you could feel the urgency and the adrenaline pumping.
Before we left Animal Kingdom, we went to a nice gift shop and found that Mickey Star Wars set Rigel had really wanted at Hollywood Studios.
We left the park right when it closed, and we were hot and tired. The wait for the bus seemed long, and we were glad to get back to the resort.
But, we had found out at Animal Kingdom earlier that day that we were about out of meals for our meal plan, so we had to discuss the issue with the front desk. It turns out that Kamren wasn’t put on our meal plan at all, so any meal he got counted against the rest. As a courtesy, we were given plenty of extra meals to tide us over. We appreciated that kind gesture.
After that experience, the kids wanted to swim, and there was a cool pool at the resort. I wasn’t interested in swimming, and needed to go to Hollywood Studios to replace a broken lightsaber, so I took the ferry there while the boys took a dip in the pool.
I thought I would love being alone, but I honestly didn’t enjoy it very much. It felt weird riding on that crowded ferry with no one to talk to. I got to Hollywood Studios, promptly replaced the lightsaber, and then thought I would shop a little more. I really wanted to find myself a nice souvenir from Disney World.
But, I still couldn’t find anything! I had really wanted something that was reminiscent of The Great Movie ride, but an attendant told me there was no such store. So, instead, I bought the kids a Star Wars book that was written as if Darth Vader had raised Luke. It was cute. I also got them a CD of A New Hope.
When I got back to the Boardwalk, I went in the gift shop there to take one last look to find myself something. I still found nothing. So, I started walking to find myself something to eat. It was nearly 8, and I figured the kids had already eaten.
Surprisingly, I saw Jad on the Boardwalk. He was getting a pizza for the kids. They still hadn’t eaten. So, we ate together. Not long after, we crashed into bed, knowing we needed to get up early to pack up.
Saturday – Blizzard Beach and home
The original plan for Saturday was to go back to a park that we didn’t get a chance to get through. But later, we got a surprise – a free admission to one of four attractions. We chose the water park – Blizzard Beach.
We had to get up early Saturday to pack and get ready to fly home.
First, we had our final breakfast – this time at the Boardwalk’s restaurant Trattorio al Forno. Jad loved his breakfast, and ended up eating a lot of mine because I didn’t like it. The food was a little too fancy for me.
After our early breakfast, we finished packing. Luckily, instead of dragging all of our stuff with us all day, we got to check our suit cases, and have our carry ons held by the resort until we came back to take the bus to the airport that afternoon.
We took a shuttle to Blizzard Beach, and arrived not long after it opened. It wasn’t a huge park – we could tell from the beginning, but it ended up being one of the favorites. Why? Because it was a relaxed atmosphere. There weren’t that many people there, and everyone could go at their own pace.
Jad and Casey were really excited about the big, scary water slides. That definitely isn’t my thing, so I took the little ones to the kids’ water section. It was actually pretty cool. There were three slides, and plenty of splashing areas. Kam and Rigel went on the slides over and over, and had a wonderful time.
Later on, Jad relieved me so I could do a couple medium intensity slides with Casey. I really don’t like water slides, so it wasn’t much more fun than watching the little ones.
But then, we found a family tube ride, called Teamboat Springs. We all loved it. We got on a large tube as a family, and descended down a huge large slide, while turning and curving and getting splashed. It was perfect for all of us, and we rode it multiple times.
We really liked being at Blizzard Beach because we could do the slides as many times as we wanted, and there was no pressure to rush around. We finally left a little after 2 PM, so we could get to the shuttle bus in time.
But, first, we had to cash in all of our snacks at the gift shop. With a meal plan, you don’t want to leave any of your points behind. So, we stocked up on candy and other snacks.
We got to the resort in plenty of time to collect our stuff. Jad even went to one of the shops at the Boardwalk to collect nice free water bottles we didn’t know about until that day. And then it was time to get on the bus to go to the airport.
It was sad to say goodbye to our trip, but we were also happy to be going home. As we rode to the airport, we reflected on the blessing of Jad attending MyComputerCareer, winning the video contest, and being able to go on this once-in-a-lifetime trip. We were also so grateful for our hosts. Melanie, the CEO’s daughter, had placed this card by our door the night before.
We got to the airport in plenty of time, so got to shop around, and eat dinner leisurely.
We ate a lot of food at Disney World, but Jad and I both remarked that our food at the airport may have been our favorite. It was Italian food. The boys, however, got good old McDonald’s.
Kamren slept during much of our airport time, until not long before we boarded. He was so tuckered out from a week of nearly no naps.
We got to the airport late that night, and drove home, happy to get back to our routine.
Adjusting back to home life
Other than the endless laundry, we were all content to be home. And really, we realized that the happiest place on earth is really just wherever we are together.
We enjoyed eating and sharing our final snack spoils, and the boys quickly utilized their light sabers in the open space of our living room.
Later we talked about our overall favorites/least favorite things about Disney World:
Jad –
Favorite Park – Hollywood Studios
Favorite rides/attractions – Mission Space, car stunt show, family tube ride at the water park, the safari, 50s Prime Time Cafe, and running at the Boardwalk
Least favorite rides/attractions – Finding Nemo, Dinosaur, Fantasmic
Mandy –
Favorite Park – Hollywood Studios
Favorite rides/attractions – Spaceship Earth, Great Movie Ride, Frozen, Magic Kingdom light show, Star Tours, Everest coaster, Ariel ride, Laugh Floor, Pixar shorts, and Mickey’s Philmar
Least favorite rides/attractions – Lion King, Splash Mountain, Toy Story Mania, Astrospace, and all the whining and crying the kids did all week
Casey –
Favorite park – Hollywood Studios
Favorite rides/attractions – Indiana Jones show*, Magic Kingdom light show, Everest coaster, Splash Mountain, Mission: Space, car stunt show, Star Tours, 50’s Prime Time Cafe, Fantasmic, family tube ride at water park
Least favorite rides/attractions – Waiting in line and countries at Epcot
Rigel –
Favorite park – Blizzard Beach
Favorite rides/attractions – Mission: Space*, Finding Nemo, AstroSpace, water park (really tall slide), Star Tours, Pinocchio Haus mac and cheese, 50s Prime Time Cafe, and Star Wars toys
Least favorite rides/attractions – Everest coaster, Haunted Mansion, and Big Thunder Mountain (only because he was afraid of them, though ironically, he couldn’t stop talking about Haunted Mansion later)
Kamren –
Favorite park – Blizzard Beach
Favorite rides/attractions – kids’ slides at water park, hotel slide, tea cup ride, carousel
Last favorite rides/attractions – countries at Epcot, rushing around
We will never forget our time at Walt Disney World 2016!
After I told you the story of the first time God saved my life, I started to ponder the other times He has come to my rescue.
There have been four times in my life that I could have – should have – gotten into a car accident, being either horribly hurt, or maybe even killed.
These are memories that I will never forget. I felt divine intervention each time. Read them and see if you believe they were merely luck or coincidence:
In 2001, I was a pretty new teenage driver. I was driving myself to my job at CVS during rush hour, something I didn’t yet have experience with. I was in the lane just left of the far right lane, a lane that so happened to be merging into mine. I saw a car start to creep in front of me, even though there wasn’t room. I was confused about why he was doing that, and just kept inching forward, hoping he would move back. Well, he didn’t move back, and kept edging into the lane, so much so, that he was inches away from hitting my car. In a panic, I swerved into the lane to the left of me, without even checking to see if there was room. My car fit perfectly into the lane. I know this was a miracle. Surely the Lord inspired a driver in that lane to slow down and make room for a teenage girl in a white Hyundai hatchback.
The same year, when going home from work, my purse fell down under my accelerator. My car spun out of control as I was entering the freeway. Still being a new driver, I was scared to death, and anticipated going off the road and hitting either another car or a tree. Somehow, I was able to pick up my purse from under the accelerator, regain control, and go on my way without hitting anyone. I felt so blessed that nobody was in front or behind me, and that I was able to regain control so quickly, before I entered mainstream traffic.
One winter, around 2009, the roads were icy because of recent snow. I had just left my apartment in Hillsborough, and was starting to go around a downhill curve. My car started to slide a lot and I lost control. Almost immediately, before I had time to panic, I felt my wheel regain control. It wasn’t my hands that did so. I felt like there were other hands controlling my steering wheel. I have always believed that angels put my car back on a safe path.
Around 2011 or 2012, I was driving in Durham on 15-501. There is a road that runs parallel to it. To get to that road, one has to turn left across several lanes. I got in the left lane to turn, but instead of going across the traffic onto the parallel road, I actually turned into the oncoming traffic. I was supposed to cross over several lanes of traffic onto a parallel road. Instead, I turned into oncoming traffic. Suddenly, everything went into slow motion. I knew that at any moment I could be hit by a car and killed, but I wasn’t alarmed and didn’t lose control. I calmly backed up into the lane I had just come from. I know this was a miracle. I should have been hit by a car, because as I turned into the traffic, several cars were headed my way. Not only did those cars not hit me, the cars behind me, who had also gotten into the turning lane, were far enough back that I could go back to safety.
I do not know why my life was spared in all these situations, as well in situations where I actually was in an accident. Perhaps it is because I am supposed to share my testimony that God is real, and that angels are real. Perhaps it is because I have a mission on this earth I am yet to fulfill. Perhaps it is simply so I can see God’s hand in my life, and always be grateful to Him for blessing me, for protecting me.
Behind the wheel is just one way in which God has been there for me. I testify He is there for you too. How have you felt God’s protection in your life?
Most of the dreams I have, I forget, or if I do remember them, they make no sense.
Well, the night of July 21, 2015, I had a dream I will never forget. The power of the Holy Ghost was so overwhelming, that it consumed my thoughts and heart during the dream, and after I awoke.
That particular night, I dreamt about Joseph Smith:
A large group of church members were at gathered at church because a play was going to be done about the Prophet Joseph Smith.
The setting of the dream was in modern times with modern conveniences.
There were so many people, that not everyone could fit to view the play. I, and a group of other people, had to sit in a classroom and listen to the play. I was actually quite content with that, because that room was actually where the actors’ offstage was located.
I remember being so excited to see the man playing Joseph Smith. After one scene, a mob scene, the actors ran into the classroom.
I was so happy to meet him. Somehow, this man looked exactly like the actor from the Joseph Smith movie.
For the rest of my dream, though, he was no longer an actor, but the real Joseph Smith.
I remember sitting at his feet and speaking to him. I talked to him about my favorite part of the gospel (In real life, the evening I had my dream, the missionaries were in my home and asked my husband and I to answer that very question). I told him it was the Holy Ghost because he testifies of truth, and because he can provide us with spiritual power to be able to testify of the truthfulness of the gospel and to do missionary work.
The Prophet Joseph told me that I was missing something important, and that I needed to focus on Jesus Christ.
He walked away then. I felt crushed and a little mad, since he didn’t offer any other explanation.
Soon, everyone in the building heard many loud noises and screams. We found out that a real mob had come to find Joseph and kill him. The mob was going around to every room searching for him. The mob finally came to our classroom. A woman in the mob yelled angrily that she could tell one of us was hiding something, and she pointed right to my son, Casey.
He fearfully said he had to go to the bathroom. I stood up with him, and took him there. The mob didn’t stop us.
We were so scared. I wondered where Joseph was, and if he was okay. I was crying a lot, and praying with my son.
I don’t know if the mob left, or if they just went elsewhere, but I soon saw Joseph again.I sat at his feet, tears streaming down my face. He stayed very calm, and asked me how I keep Heavenly Father fresh in my mind.
I told him that I pray to Him, and also that I often ponder on the Plan of Salvation. He was pleased with my answers. I don’t remember what else I said, but the thought stayed with me of how important it is to always keep Heavenly Father in my mind.
I felt so happy in Joseph’s presence. He told me that he would be okay, and that the mob would not hurt him.
He had felt that this would happen, so long before he had come that night, a plan was formulated on how to hide him. A master carpenter had changed a large wooden cabinet into a wall, so Joseph could hide behind it as long as was necessary. Nobody would ever think to look behind a wall for him.
He was prepared to stay in there as long as needed, and there were members who would have brought him food, water, and clothes.
I felt a deep, abiding love for the man in my dream – a respect, a reverence and an admiration I cannot describe.
When I awoke, I felt that the Holy Ghost had testified to me in my dream that Joseph Smith was a true prophet. He also had given me a small taste of the horror the early Saints went through as angry, hateful mobs – armed to kill – invaded their homes and lives.
I am grateful for this dream. The tears flowed during the dream, and as I wrote my memories of it. I already knew that Joseph Smith was a prophet. I have known that for a long time. Now, though, I feel like I know him, and I have received counsel from him that he would have told me had I lived when he did.
“The fundamental principles of our religion are the testimony of the Apostles and Prophets, concerning Jesus Christ, that He died, was buried, and rose again the third day, and ascended into heaven; and all other things which pertain to our religion are only appendages to it.” – President Joseph Smith, Jr.
President Harold B. Lee taught that: “Christ came not only into the world to make an atonement for the sins of mankind but to set an example before the world of the standard of perfection of God’s law and of obedience to the Father. In his Sermon on the Mount the Master has given us somewhat of a revelation of his own character, which was perfect,… and in so doing has given us a blueprint for our own lives.”
The Sermon on the Mount is found in Matthew, Chapters 5-7 in the New Testament, and is filled with invaluable counsel from our Savior on how to live righteous lives, and to be more like Him.
I wish to focus on the beatitudes, which are blessings we can receive if we come unto Christ. President Lee said that the beatitudes embody the “constitution for a perfect life.”
The beatitudes are interrelated and progressive in their arrangement, each one building on the others. We can receive the blessings of each as we choose to come unto Christ.
1. Blessed are the poor in spirit: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
When thinking of the poor in spirit, I first think of people who are sad, depressed, lonely, and without hope.
President Lee explained that the poor in spirit, “means those who are spiritually needy, who feel so impoverished spiritually that they reach out with great yearning for help.”
The Lord gave this invitation, “Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. “Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls.”
Elder Jeffrey R. Holland taught: “This reliance upon the merciful nature of God is at the very center of the gospel Christ taught. I testify that the Savior’s Atonement lifts from us not only the burden of our sins but also the burden of our disappointments and sorrows, our heartaches and our despair… Considering the incomprehensible cost of the Crucifixion and Atonement, I promise you He is not going to turn His back on us now. When He says to the poor in spirit, “Come unto me,” He means He knows the way out and He knows the way up. He knows it because He has walked it. He knows the way because He is the way…If you are lonely, please know you can find comfort. If you are discouraged, please know you can find hope. If you are poor in spirit, please know you can be strengthened. If you feel you are broken, please know you can be mended.”
2. Blessed are they that mourn: for they shall be comforted.
It may at first glance seem strange that one who is feeling such a deep loss is considered blessed. However, through such loss, our hope of the resurrection is strengthened, we come to a greater understanding of the eternal perspective, and we become more aware that, as Elder Russell M. Nelson has said, “Life does not begin with birth, nor does it end with death.”
Robert E. Wells of the first quorum of the 70, taught,”When we can see the Lord’s purposes fulfilled in that which gives us sorrow, the Holy Ghost can give us full consolation, and the atonement and resurrection truly become to us the cornerstone of our faith. In the midst of mourning one discovers deeper dimensions of love, friendship, and brotherhood…It is in the midst of mourning that one discovers the personal closeness of his Heavenly Father and his Savior Jesus Christ and the comfort of the Holy Ghost… We will be blessed in mourning and be comforted as we reflect on eternal marriage, eternal families, eternal values.”
3. Blessed are the meek: for they shall inherit the earth.
When I hear the word meek, I always think about Christ, for that is how he was described. He was gentle, submissive, kind, selfless and humble.
Elder Neal A. Maxwell said that “one cannot develop those other crucial virtues—faith, hope, and charity—without meekness…Meekness…is more than self-restraint; it is the presentation of self in a posture of kindness and gentleness, reflecting certitude, strength, serenity, and a healthy self-esteem and self-control. Without meekness, the conversational points we insist on making often take the form of “I”—that spearlike, vertical pronoun.”
If we do most often only think about ourselves, like Elder Maxwell warned, we are not humble. President Spencer W. Kimball said that to be meek one must be humble. He asked, “How does one get humble? To me, one must constantly be reminded of his dependence. On whom dependent? On the Lord. How remind one’s self? By real, constant, worshipful, grateful prayer.”
4. Blessed are they which do hunger and thirst after righteousness: for they shall be filled.
If I hunger or thirst for something, that means I desire it, and I need it for my health. Those who desire righteousness, consistently look for opportunities to do good so they can stay spiritually healthy. They work hard to find ways to be more like Christ, who is the bread of life and the living water.
Sheri L Dew explained: “Hungering and thirsting translate to sheer spiritual labor. Worshiping in the temple, repenting to become increasingly pure, forgiving and seeking forgiveness, and earnest fasting and prayer all increase our receptivity to the Spirit. Spiritual work works and is the key to learning to hear the voice of the Lord.”
The Lord promises us that if we do these things we will be filled with the Holy Ghost. I know I have felt an abundance of the Spirit when I do these things, and I would also add studying my scriptures, serving others, and sharing the gospel with others.
With this gift, comes great responsibility. Elder Robert D Hales counseled that “We who have the gift of the Holy Ghost must be true to its promptings so we can be a light to others. “‘Let your light so shine before men,’ said the Lord, ‘that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven.’”
5. Blessed are the merciful: for they shall obtain mercy.
When I think of being merciful, I think of being kind to someone who isn’t kind back. I think of, instead of judging someone or disliking someone, trying to see into their hearts, and realize we don’t know all that people go through. I think of turning the other cheek, rather than seeking revenge, when you have been wronged.
From the scriptures, I think of Captain Moroni, who commanded the Nephite army to stop slaying the Lamanites, and rather call a truce, when he saw their terror at being surrounded on all sides. I think of the good Samaritan, seeing only a person in need, and not taking thought to his race, culture, or background. I think, most of all, of Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ, who have provided a way for we imperfect people to be clean and return to live with God again.
President Dieter F. Uchtdorf reminds us that …”that we are all imperfect—that we are beggars before God. …How can we deny to others any measure of the grace we so desperately desire for ourselves? My beloved brothers and sisters, should we not forgive as we wish to be forgiven? Remember, heaven is filled with those who have this in common: They are forgiven. And they forgive.”
I know that as I have chosen to let go of grudges and judgment, that I have been able to really see God’s love for others, and also for imperfect me. I have seen His tender mercies in my life the more compassionate I am to others, whether it be giving to the poor and needy, helping someone who doesn’t show me appreciation, or just choosing not to be offended, but rather to forgive.
6. Blessed are the pure in heart: for they shall see God.
Elder Joseph B. Wirthlin defines being pure in heart this way: “To be without guile is to be pure in heart, an essential virtue of those who would be counted among true followers of Christ. … “If we are without guile, we are honest, true, and righteous. Those who are honest are fair and truthful in their speech, straightforward in their dealings, free of deceit…Honesty is of God; dishonesty of the devil, who was a liar from the beginning. Righteousness means living a life that is in harmony with the laws, principles, and ordinances of the gospel.”
L. Whitney Clayton of the 70 added that “The condition of our heart determines how much evidence of divinity we see in the world now and qualifies us for the eventual realization of the promise that the pure “shall see God.” Ours is a quest for purity.”
President Joseph Smith said that if we strive for this purity, we “will be able to more perfectly understand the difference between right and wrong—between the things of God and the things of men; and [our] path[s] will be like that of the just, which shineth brighter and brighter unto the perfect day.”
7. Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be called the children of God.
Within His sermon, Jesus warns us against anger, which is of the Devil. He instead councils us to love our neighbors, and even love our enemies – to pray for them and do good for them. This makes sense, for we should do unto others as we would have them do unto us. That is the golden rule.
In a recent news conference on religious freedom and nondiscrimination, Elder Holland wisely said: “Every citizen’s rights are best guarded when each person and group guards for others those rights they wish guarded for themselves.”
A large part of being peacemakers is being merciful to our fellow citizens, neighbors, friends, and family. There is more being a peacemaker, though. Elder Bruce R. McConkie said that “only those who believe and spread the fulness of the gospel are peacemakers within the perfect meaning of this Beatitude. The gospel is the message of peace to all mankind.”
When I first read this quote as I taught Institute, my testimony of missionary work grew exponentially. Elder Dallin H Oaks said that “…peace can only come through the gospel of Jesus Christ.” President Joseph F.Smith added to this truth, saying that to bring peace, the gospel must be “understood, obeyed, and practiced by rulers and people alike.”
What an essential mission we followers of Christ have. He trusts us to help bring peace to our homes, communities, and even the world. I can only hope I can always be worthy of that sacred trust.
8. Blessed are they which are persecuted for righteousness’ sake: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
If we are being true peacemakers and sharing the light of the gospel, we will be persecuted, for as Elder Lawrence Corbridge said, “The truth will always be opposed.”
We know this is true. Jesus brought the Truth to the world – He was the Truth – and he was rejected, betrayed, scourged, abandoned, crucified.
Christ was persecuted more than we will ever be, but he still loved and forgave those who hurt him. He endured the persecution without retaliation, but rather turned the other cheek.
Elder Hales said that when our beliefs are criticized, we need to follow the Savior’s example. He said, “Some people mistakenly think responses such as silence, meekness, forgiveness, and bearing humble testimony are passive or weak… But to “love [our] enemies…takes faith, strength, and, most of all, Christian courage.”
Elder Holland counseled, “Defend your beliefs with courtesy and with compassion, but defend them. In courageously pursuing such a course, you will forge unshakable faith, you will find safety against ill winds that blow, even shafts in the whirlwind, and you will feel the rock-like strength of our Redeemer, upon whom if you build your unflagging discipleship, you cannot fall.”
This promise brings me so much peace. I will continue to defend my faith throughout my life, with as much courtesy and compassion as I can. I am grateful that if I do this, the Lord will not let me fail.
Just as President Lee said that the beatitudes embody the constitution for a perfect life, Christ, in His sermon asked us to “Be ye therefore perfect, even as your Father which is in heaven is perfect.”
President James E. Faust explained that “Perfection is an eternal goal. While we cannot be perfect in mortality, striving for it is a commandment which ultimately, through the Atonement, we can keep.”
I thank my Savior for giving us the course we need for perfection. I know that as we strive to follow the principles in the beatitudes, and utilize the Lord’s atonement for forgiveness and spiritual strength throughout our lives, that we will receive the blessings God has promised us, most importantly, a place in His kingdom for all eternity.
August 28, 2011 was just like any normal Sunday. We went to church as usual, and had dinner at my parents’ house. Everything seemed fine. Then, that night, after we put the kids to bed, Jad started to get stomach pain. He said he felt like knives were stabbing him. He started to throw up, and he kept wailing in pain. He was freezing cold, but sweating too. He couldn’t even stand up. He just kneeled over the toilet and screamed that he needed to go to the hospital.
I was very worried. I knew Jad wouldn’t say that unless something was really wrong. I couldn’t take him there because I had two children (one a young baby) asleep in their beds. I then thought of calling my brother, Aaron. He graciously accepted my plea to take Jad to the emergency room.
When Aaron arrived, I had managed to get Jad down the stairs, but he was kneeling over the steps moaning, with a bucket nearby. It would have been comical, had it not been so disconcerting. I watched, feeling helpless, as Aaron slowly led Jad to his car and off to Durham Regional Hospital. Aaron told me he drove as fast as he could, recognizing just how bad it must be… Jad was a very tough person, and he could barely talk.
I didn’t sleep well that night. I keep waiting for my phone to ring with an update. The only comfort was in knowing my brother was with him.
Aaron related to me the events of that first night, and it made me even more grateful he was there. When they first got to the emergency room, nobody seemed to notice Jad could barely stand. While he was bombarded with paperwork, Aaron gingerly held up his body weight.
When Jad got to a room, he was given an IV to remove the pain. Ridiculously, though, the nurse had to stab him many times before finding a vein. She kept apologizing, saying she was new. Jad didn’t seem to notice at first, but finally grunted in displeasure.
Jad saw a doctor soon after, and after explaining his symptoms, the doctor recommended that he get a CT scan. Aaron and Jad were then told to sit tight until the doctors transferred shifts. That ended up being several hours. When the second doctor finally arrived, he confirmed the need for a CT scan. Jad had to drink a liquid in three doses to cleanse his body. A nurse was supposed to check on him to give him each dose, but she didn’t. Aaron took it upon himself to administer the liquid to Jad.
Finally, he got the CT scan. Brian McDonald, someone we didn’t know then but do now from church, gave him this scan. The doctor came in to show Jad the x-ray, which showed a large growth on his liver. He told Jad grimly that he most likely had a cancerous tumor.
At receiving this news, Jad wept. He did not want to die and leave his family alone. What would they do? He wasn’t ready to leave this earth yet.
I am so grateful Aaron was with him to comfort him during this heartbreaking time.
I came to the hospital the next morning after taking Casey to school. I asked for prayers from my friends and family, and held on to faith that all would be well. After all, they had not yet confirmed it was cancer.
Rigel and I visiting Jad in the hospital.
We were so blessed and grateful to soon hear that cancer was out of the list of possible diagnoses. If that huge growth were a malignant tumor, Jad would have been dead long ago. We breathed a sigh of relief, but longed to know what was really wrong.
That whole day, we waited to know what was in his body. At one point, a whole room of doctors came in, and said they didn’t have an answer but were still working on it. All they knew was that he had something large, living, and growing inside of his liver. They said that Jad would have to have a lot of blood taken. Some of the blood would be sent to Maryland to be tested.
We were so grateful for the visitors we received during all this waiting. It made it a little easier to endure.
The following day, August 30, the doctors had a theory: Jad had a Middle-Eastern parasite that had been growing inside his body for years. They said his condition must be very rare since none of them had ever seen it before.
Once the blood tests were sent off, Jad was able to return home to await a diagnosis. He would have to return to the hospital once the blood tests came back. The doctors said if the blood tests were inconclusive, he would have to have a liver biopsy.
Exactly one week later, on September 6, Jad and I went to Duke University Hospital to get the news from Dr. Luke Chen, the Infectious Disease Specialist there. After about four hours at the hospital (most of it spent waiting), we got our answer: Jad had Echinococcus.
Dr. Chen, a Chinese man with an Australian accent, drew pictures for us of what was going on in Jad’s liver. He had never actually seen anyone with Echinococcus before, but he said Jad must have had the disease for at least 10 years, based on the size of the cystic matter. He told us how this parasite can infect many organs, and that Jad was very lucky it was the liver, because the liver is the only body part that can regenerate itself. He also expressed relief that the infection manifested itself when it did, because it could have ruptured at any time, ending Jad’s life.
A doctor in the Northeast told Dr. Chen about a patient she had had with Echinococcus. She said that if Jad needed surgery, it would be best for a cancer surgeon to operate. Dr. Chen told Jad that if he had surgery, Dr. Bryan Clary would be his surgeon. He had never operated on someone with this condition, but he was one of the best out there.
He put Jad on a pill that is supposed to cure Echinoccocus (it had to be specially ordered), in the off chance that he could be cured. More realistically, though, Dr. Chen expected the medicine to just stop the cyst from growing. Jad had to be on this pill for two months before he could have surgery
We left the office that day a little overwhelmed, but with faith all would be well. We really liked Dr. Chen, and knew Jad was in good hands. He was so interested in Jad’s case, and wanted to learn everything he could. He was also very friendly, helpful, and offered us as much information as possible. We could tell he cared about Jad’s well-being.
After that appointment, we were really curious to find out how Jad got this infectious disease.
Well, after some reflection with his mother, Salma, Jad figured it out:
In the Spring of 1999, when Jad was 17 years old, he and many members of his family went to have a barbecue near a farming community on the Dead Sea. There were people on the street selling lettuce from their farms. Jad’s family ended up buying a large box of lettuce. Jad loves lettuce, so naturally, he started to eat it. One of his mother’s cousins said that the lettuce should probably be washed before it was eaten, but the consensus of the group was that if they just shook the lettuce off, it would be fine. His whole family ate the lettuce without a problem. That evening, though, Jad started to get very itchy. He also had bumps all over his body, and swelling. Salma took Jad to an urgent care to be checked out. The doctor attributed the bumps and itching to an allergic reaction. He gave Jad a shot to help with the itching and swelling. The shot worked, so Jad went home.
This would not be the only time Jad had a reaction over the next few years.
In summer 2002, when Jad was living in Port St. Lucie, FL, he had another reaction. He had gone out to eat and eaten a tuna salad. Late that night, he got very itchy, with bumps and swelling. His uncle Hani took him to the hospital, and the doctor said he probably had food poisoning. He was treated for that, and sent on his way.
Jad’s uncle Hani complained to the restaurant about the food poisoning, but the restaurant did not want to take responsibility. The hospital recommended that Jad to go to an allergist to try to find an explanation for his symptoms. After the tests, the allergist told him he had no allergies at all. The restaurant still claimed it wasn’t food poisoning, but offered to pay for the allergist appointment.
The following summer, something much worse happened. Jad had eaten dinner at home with his uncles William and Hani, and his other roommate, Ihan. Hani had made chicken wraps with large amounts of onion. After dinner, Jad felt bloated. That night, while he was sleeping, Jad got a huge stabbing pain in the right side of his body. He was terrified because he couldn’t feel or move his right side at all. William and Ihan quickly took him to the same hospital as the year before. The doctor was not that concerned about Jad’s condition, and said he just had bad gas. He gave him a lot of pain medication and pills for bloating.
In late summer 2004, when Jad was in Jordan, something else happened. He got something called a Christmas Tree rash. It lasted for about 45 days. The doctor said it was very common and not dangerous – just an allergic reaction.
Following that summer, Jad did not have any serious symptoms. He would just occasionally have pain under his ribcage. He always assumed it was gas.
After we told Jad’s family that the issues he had all those years were due to Echinococcus, they started to do some research. They said that many people in Jordan over the years had gotten the same infection – many in their lungs – and there had been many deaths. Only in the past 6-7 years had Jordanian doctors finally started to get familiar with the disease.
Did it bother you that all of these doctors just made assumptions instead of finding out the issue? Did you recognize, as we did, that had any of these hospitals done a CT scan, Jad could have easily been cured, with no need for surgery? We had a little frustration over this, but mostly just held on to our hopes that the Lord would bless Jad to make it through this, and that our family would come out stronger with lessons learned.
Before surgery was scheduled, Jad had another CT scan, just to see what was going on in his liver. The cysts, as anticipated, were still there, as big as ever, but there had been no progression. Yes, Jad definitely needed surgery.
He met with Dr. Clary to get options for the surgery, and to set a date. I wasn’t there for that appointment, but Jad’s brother, Tawfeeq, accompanied him. Dr. Clary gave Jad two options: robotic surgery or invasive surgery. With robotic surgery, Jad would only have a couple small scars, but his risks of dying were higher. In contrast, invasive surgery would be less risky, but he would end up with a huge scar, and cold weather would cause him pain going forward. Dr. Clary let Jad choose, but made it clear which was the safer choice. Jad chose the invasive surgery option.
Surgery was scheduled for November 10, 2011.
You may wonder how Jad and I were feeling as the date approached. It’s interesting. Jad and I were never really that scared. We both knew everything was going to work out. We even went into it all with a positive attitude, looking for the benefits for our family. For example, here is my Facebook status post from November 4, 2011:
Ah, I love my family so much! I can’t wait for Jad to come home tomorrow. Then we’ll be together every day for at least a month while Jad heals from surgery, which is next Thursday. I’m sure this experience will only bring us closer.
A picture of our happy family just a couple weeks before the surgery.
November 9 arrived, and I asked for my friends and family to pray that Jad’s surgery would go smoothly the following day. I received an outpouring of support, love and prayers. My friend, Jada, put a post on Facebook that brought me great peace. She said:
Much love to Jad and the entire Al-Bjaly family. God has an army of angels to watch over you all. I pray with all my heart that His grace and mercy will be with you and that you will have peace throughout the entire process of surgery and recovery. Much love. Let me know if you need anything.
We went to bed that night ready to face the day. We had to be at Duke Hospital really early in the morning, like around 5:30 AM. My mother was an angel to come to our home before we left, and take care of my sleeping children. She would get Casey off to school and then bring Rigel to the hospital to wait with me until the surgery was over.
I remember riding the elevator together when we got to the hospital. We were going up into the unknown. We had only been married for less than two years, and here we were, going through something so serious, something we never would have expected. After Jad was prepped for surgery, I was taken back to wish him well and give him my love. The anesthesiologist said I needed to give him his “goodnight kiss.” I did just that, and then turned to leave him in the surgeon’s hands.
It was amazing how many people were in the waiting room. They were all waiting for a loved one to come out of surgery. My mom and Rigel were with me the whole time, and we watched people. We even had a conversation here and there. I was never afraid. I was a little impatient, though, especially as the four-hour mark went by. He should have been done with his surgery by then. The minutes kept ticking, and I yearned to hear my name over the loud speaker to come get an update. At one point, I did go up and ask. The person at the desk inquired with Dr. Clary for me, and he just said the surgery was taking longer than expected.
Tick tock. Tick tock. Late in the afternoon, Jad’s mom, Salma, aunt Rania, grandmother, Nada, and uncle Hani, came from Kinston to sit in the waiting room and show their support. They brought lots of Arabic cookies. Aaron came to visit too.
After about eight hours, I got called up to the desk. The surgery was finally over. I gave a huge sigh of relief and contentment.
Dr. Clary called all of us into this office to explain what he had found during the surgery. He said that he removed a mass about the size of a football from Jad’s body. The cysts had been attached to Jad’s diaphragm and gallbladder as well. Not only was most of Jad’s liver removed, but also his gallbladder. Removing the cystic matter from the diaphragm was very intricate work, causing the surgery to last so much longer than planned. We were shocked at all this, and even more grateful Jad was alive and well.
My mom and Aaron headed home with Rigel, and I stayed behind with Jad’s family to be able to hopefully see him. After about an hour, I was the first to be able to see Jad. I was a little nervous walking down the long, cold hallway. When I approached my husband, he was moaning and could barely talk or keep his eyes open. He didn’t seem to quite know what was going on. Jad may not have realized I was there, but regardless, I held his hand, spoke sweetly to him, told him I loved him, and sweetly kissed his forehead.
When I was with him, my first feelings were that of sympathy for my poor husband…but then I felt God’s love surrounding both of us. I knew that He was with us, and that Jad’s surgery went well because of faith and prayers, and because Jad had a special mission to perform for the Lord in this life. He would recover, and he would go forward in faith.
It was hard to leave him, but I promised I would be back the next day. Jad’s family members took turns visiting him too. I saw tears as they re-entered the waiting room. We said our goodbyes, and left Jad at the hospital.
He did not remember any of us visiting him that evening. Late that night, though, after I put the kids to bed, I got a phone call. A nurse from Duke told me that Jad had woken up and was asking for his wife. My heart broke a little, and I wished I could be with him. I promised I would be there the next morning.
My cousin, Lisa, yet another angel in this story, came down from Virginia for several days to help watch my kids so that I could be with Jad as often as possible. I drove back and forth to Duke way more times than I ever thought I would in my life during the next six days. Often, Salma came with me. Other times, when Lisa wasn’t able to watch the kids, I would take Salma to the hospital, go home, and come get her later. I wanted someone with Jad as often as possible.
When I first saw Jad that first day after surgery, I was so humbled. Seeing him that way, I realized how much we take our bodies for granted. He needed help with everything – eating, drinking, adjusting pillows – moving at all. As I observed his difficulty, I started to giggle – something I do when I am nervous or unsure. I think the nurse thought I was either really crazy or really insensitive. I actually was a little alarmed. I hadn’t expected him to be so bad off.
Jad told me that the previous night he had a dream. I won’t recount the details, but it was a confirmation to him that there is life after death, and that it was not his time to go.
Throughout the next few days, Jad slept a lot, and I read more books than I had in a long time. He also had to practice walking. The first time I walked with him, both Salma and I helped him, and he literally walked as slowly as a turtle. It was hard to walk that slowly, but I always held his hand.
To quickly summarize Jad’s progress through November 16, the day he went home, here are my Facebook statuses for those days:
Saturday, Nov 12 – For those of you who want an update on Jad, here it is: He will be in the hospital until at least Tuesday. He is lucid, but is still very tired and weak. He is also still in a lot of pain. He has gotten up and walked around a couple times, but it’s really hard for him. We were told this is the worst day for him, so hopefully it only goes up from here. He can have visitors any time, as long as they are 12 or older. He is in room 4115 at Duke University Hospital.
Sunday, Nov 13 – Jad was feeling much better today. He isn’t hooked up to all the tubes anymore. It is still really hard to get up and walk, and he still sleeps a lot, but he is definitely getting better. Hopefully tomorrow he can get out of the hospital gown and put on some real clothes. I know he’s looking forward to it.
I believe this was the only day Jad saw Casey and Rigel during his hospital stay. My mom brought them to Duke, and we talked to Jad in the hallway. He was still in his hospital gown. The kids couldn’t go into his room, which is why he had to venture out. It was so nice to have us all together, even just for a little while.
Tuesday, Nov 15 – Jad is feeling much better today and after today, no more tubes. He should be going home tomorrow or Thursday. It’s still hard to walk and move a lot because of pain, but hopefully that will get better in a couple weeks.
Wednesday, Nov 16 – I am so proud of Jad. I walked into his hospital room this morning, and he had gotten a shower, shaved, gotten dressed, and done his hair all by himself. AND, he is coming home today!!!!
It sounds kind of silly to say I was proud of him for doing normal things, but honestly, after such an intense surgery, the ability for him to do anything on his own was impressive.
Later that day, I was able to bring Jad home. I was thrilled. I had longed for our family to be together again. I remember going to get the van, and waiting by the front for him to come out. I kept looking and looking. Such joy overcame me as I saw him being wheeled out of the hospital. After being assisted into the van very slowly, we started our journey back home and to recovery. I felt bad because I know that he was in so much pain the whole way home, but he tried to be strong. When we got home, it took us several minutes to get him out of the car, down the steps, and down the walkway to our townhome. Each step was a victory.
The first thing he wanted once he got situated on the couch was Jello with pineapple in it. He had really enjoyed his Jello at the hospital. He had been on the “bland diet”, so that was the most exciting food he had eaten there.
The next week or two were very hard on me. I was taking care of my husband and my two children by myself. We so appreciated the meals our friends brought to us, as well as the love and support from everyone. Going up the stairs was really hard for Jad for a while, and he had to sleep sitting up with lots of pillows around him. Slowly, though, the pain started to lessen and the wounds started to heal.
The first picture of Jad holding Rigel after his surgery.
The family on Thanksgiving Day, not long after the surgery.
Now, Jad is healthy and life is back to normal. We will never forget that time of our lives, though, for we learned so many lessons:
We knew that the scare that Jad had was a blessing from God, for without it, he may have eventually died from a ruptured cyst. We gained a stronger testimony of the Word of Wisdom. Jad quit drinking in 2008, when he was investigating the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. He used to drink every night. Had he kept drinking, he very well may have died from his infection, because his liver would have been completely destroyed. We received a second confirmation that leaving my job was the right thing to do. It had been really hard for me to adjust to not working, but, had I still been working when all this was going on with Jad, I would not have been able to be with him and help him through it. Those times in the hospital, and the weeks following, were such a tender experience for us. I needed to be with him during that time. We found one more reason that Jad was supposed to live in North Carolina: excellent doctors and surgeons who would take the time to properly diagnose him and operate on him. We felt so much love from family and friends. We will always remember the kindness, generosity, faith and prayers.
Most importantly, we felt God’s love for us. We knew He was with Jad, that He was always with Jad. This was all part of the plan, and He prepared a way for him to survive, from moving to United States, to joining the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, to moving to North Carolina. This trial he faced was only a test. It would make him stronger, and was for his good. Maybe it is a good thing Jad has such a large scar. It is a constant and profound reminder that miracles do happen.
***If you would like to see pictures of Jad’s liver, see below. If you get queasy easily, you probably shouldn’t scroll any further. Enjoy!***
