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  • Pornography: I say it. I talk about it. You should too.

    Once upon a time, there was a young woman who went out to college. She met a young man. Though she for a long time only saw him as a friend, her feelings finally turned into something more and they fell in love. 

    They had many conversations about their pasts. He told her that he used to have a pornography addiction but he was over it. She believed him. 

    He visited her over the summer after that semester and asked her to marry him. She said yes. 

    One night, after she was back at school, he told her he had viewed pornographic images once during their engagement, while she was away for the summer.

    This was very hard for her, and she considered breaking off the engagement. But she ultimately decided she loved him and still wanted to marry him. They got married.

    Married life was good sometimes, and other times really hard. He often did not treat her with love and respect. He once told her he loved himself more than her. They had good times too, though, and during one of these good times, the young couple chose to have a baby. They had a baby boy.

    Having a baby did not heal their marriage woes. The marriage continued to decline. She finally found out that he had gotten back into pornography. That explained his declining grades, his secretiveness, his temper, their lack of intimacy.

    She was angry and heartbroken. She quickly realized, though, that even though her love for her husband was gone, she did not want to sever the relationship. For her child, she was willing to work hard to fix her marriage. They counseled with the bishop of their congregation. The young man started a 12-step addiction recovery program.

    There seemed to be some hope, but it soon faltered. He decided overcoming his addiction was too hard. His family was not worth all that trouble. He asked for a divorce. She obliged, but it was the hardest thing she had ever had to do in her life. 

    After college graduation, she and her son left him. They moved far away.

    And they lived happily ever after?

    Well, after years of self-esteem issues, guilt over leaving her son in daycare, and feelings of ostracism for being young and divorced with a child, she finally found happiness again. She is happier than ever. 

    His life has not changed for the better. 

    *******

    This story is not one that any of us would want to write into our histories, nor into the histories of our children. However, because this is a true story, and there are so many others like it, it is important to explore how this story could have been written very differently. 

    The first thing that is important for us to consider is that a pornography addiction can happen to anyone regardless of age, sex, religion, or marital status. In the story, he was the one with an addiction, but it could have just as easily have been her. 

    Because age is not a factor in whether or not someone will develop a pornography addiction, we need to start teaching our children about pornography from a young age. 

    Before we can tell our kids about pornography, we need to tell them about passions and feelings. 

    Sister Linda Reeves, the 2nd Counselor in the General Relief Society presidency in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (LDS church) explained, “One reason we are here on earth is to learn to manage the passions and feelings of our mortal bodies. These God-given feelings help us want to marry and have children. The intimate marriage relationship between a man and a woman that brings children into mortality is also meant to be a beautiful, loving experience that binds together two devoted hearts, unites both spirit and body, and brings a fulness of joy and happiness as we learn to put each other first.”

    These same feelings aroused outside of marriage, however, are not characterized as love, but rather lust. Elder Jeffrey R. Holland, an apostle in the LDS church spoke of the different between love and lust:

    “Why is lust such a deadly sin? Well, in addition to the completely Spirit-destroying impact it has upon our souls, I think it is a sin because it defiles the highest and holiest relationship God gives us in mortality—the love that a man and a woman have for each other and the desire that couple has to bring children into a family intended to be forever. Someone said once that true love must include the idea of permanence. True love endures. But lust changes as quickly as it can turn a pornographic page or glance at yet another potential object for gratification walking by, male or female. True love we are absolutely giddy about… But lust is characterized by shame and stealth and is almost pathologically clandestine—the later and darker the hour the better, with a double-bolted door just in case. Love makes us instinctively reach out to God and other people. Lust, on the other hand, is anything but godly and celebrates self-indulgence. Love comes with open hands and open heart; lust comes with only an open appetite.”

    Now that our kids know that participating in pornography is a poison to true love, we need to now tell them what pornography actually is. According to the Miriam-Webster dictionary it is movies, pictures, magazines, etc., that show or describe naked people or sex in a very open and direct way in order to cause sexual excitement. 

    As I ponder the “etc.” in the definition, I think of books (think romance novels, for example), TV shows, music, music videos, video games, photo advertisements, and sometimes even products. Anything created to induce sexual excitement can be considered pornography. It doesn’t have to be Playboys, movies from adult video stores, and naked images from porn websites. As long as the materials arouse a person sexually, they are considered pornography. Explicit nudity is not a prerequisite.

    Some might might call this a difference of “hard porn” and “soft porn.” Elder Dallin H. Oaks, an apostle in the LDS church, said, “Some seek to justify their indulgence by arguing that they are only viewing “soft,” not “hard,” porn. A wise bishop called this refusing to see evil as evil. He quoted men seeking to justify their viewing choices by comparisons such as “not as bad as” or “only one bad scene.” But the test of what is evil is not its degree but its effect. When persons entertain evil thoughts long enough for the Spirit to withdraw, they lose their spiritual protection and they are subject to the power and direction of the evil one. When they use Internet or other pornography for what this bishop described as “arousal on demand” (letter of Mar. 13, 2005), they are deeply soiled by sin.”

    In this quote, we see some of the dangers from pornography: loss of the Spirit and subjection to the Devil’s power. 
    Sister Reeves explained how important it is to talk to our kids about these dangers: “We as parents and leaders need to counsel with our children and youth on an ongoing basis, listening with love and understanding. They need to know the dangers of pornography and how it overtakes lives, causing loss of the Spirit, distorted feelings, deceit, damaged relationships, loss of self-control, and nearly total consumption of time, thought, and energy.”
    It is so important that our conversations with our kids are ongoing, and even go beyond the damaging effects of pornography.

    Jeffrey J. Ford, MS, a marriage and family therapist in St. George, UT, advised to have many conversations with our kids about pornography to clarify our values, let our kids express opinions, instill truths about sexuality, and answer our kids’ questions. We should also discuss the “what if” scenarios with our kids so they know what to do if a friend tries to show them a dirty magazine, or if a teacher starts showing an inappropriate movie, etc. This way, if they do come in contact with pornography, they have already made the decision of how to get away from it. Dr. Ford stresses that kids need a safe place to talk about porn, and that should be in the home. 
    The Utah Coalition Against Pornography encourages us to tell our kids about our experiences with pornography. This way they can see that we also have struggles, and have empathy for theirs. We should encourage our kids to tell us within 10 minutes if they have had contact with pornography, and then praise them when they do.
    My friend let me borrow a CD of a sermon her pastor had given a few years back about sex and pornography. Several of his points were excellent. He said that we need to be the ones to tell our kids about sex and their bodies. (You may need to have the same conversations more than once and with varying detail – my son already forgot what sex is and I told him less than four months ago.) If you tell them about everything, they won’t feel the need to look up this information and, as a result, come in contact with pornography. We should always tell our kids the truth when they ask us, and look for teachable moments. Talking about pornography can be a little embarrassing, but we should remember it is the Devil who does not want us to talk about it. “Silence is a reckless option.” Our kids can only make good sexual choices if they know what they are. 

    As a young kid, maybe 10, I was exposed to pornography. A friend of mine showed me a copy of one of her father’s Playboy magazines while her mother was running an errand. On another occasion, she closed us up in one of the rooms of her house and showed me, on mute, parts of a pornographic movie. I never told my parents about it, probably because our family did not ever sit together and talk about pornography, how it is wrong, and what to do if you see it. As mentioned, it can be embarrassing to talk about pornography, but it must be done to protect our children, and to help them know how to react when porn comes into their grasp.

    I just had a conversation about pornography with my 9-year-old son on Sunday. I told him about the feelings and about what pornography is. At that age, he doesn’t really understand. However, he does understand our bodies are temples, that we are created in the image of God, and that bodies should be viewed and treated with such respect. He does know what to do if he sees naked images. He knows what to do if he hears a song that makes him uncomfortable. I also gave him the advice that if friends at school whisper for him to come look at something, he probably wouldn’t want to go over there. Any time a kid feels the need to be secretive about something, most likely he/she is breaking a rule.

    In our counsels with our children about pornography, we should decide what our media standards are going to be and why. These media standards should be kept by all members of the family. If you wouldn’t want your kid looking at it, reading it, or listening to it, then it most likely should not be in the house at all. Don’t think they won’t find it. Kids snoop around when you aren’t home. They find the romance novels and the dirty magazines. 
    Even with standards, we need to safeguard further by keeping our TVs and computers in common areas, as well as installing parental controls for our computers, TVs, and handheld devices, such as cell phones and tablets. (Sister Reeves mentioned that most kids get involved with porn through these handheld electronics.) This way members of the family will not accidentally, or be tempted to purposely, partake in pornography. 

    A couple good free internet filters are k9webprotection.com and opendns.com. For cell phones, you can install parental controls that can even disable the internet and texting, if you like. I recently downloaded Kids Place on my phone, and it has many options for safeguarding kids from inappropriate content.

    Social media is also a place where pornography is rampant. It would be beneficial for us to be friends with our kids on Facebook, Instagram, etc., to monitor what they are posting and liking.

    These filters are great at helping prevent the viewing, listening, and reading of pornography, but Sister Reeves has an even better filter option:  “…The greatest filter in the world, the only one that will ultimately work, is the personal internal filter that comes from a deep and abiding testimony of our Heavenly Father’s love and our Savior’s atoning sacrifice for each one of us.”

    Elder David A. Bednar, an apostle for the LDS church, said, “Such testimony fortifies faith and provides direction. Such testimony generates light in a world that grows increasingly dark. Such testimony is the source of an eternal perspective and of enduring peace…”

    Once Sister Reeves and her husband were praying because they were overwhelmed with their young children and all their other responsibilities. The answer to their prayer was, “It is OK if the house is a mess and the children are still in their pajamas and some responsibilities are left undone. The only things that really need to be accomplished in the home are daily scripture study and prayer and weekly family home evening.”

    These spiritual filters – testimony, scripture study, prayer and Family Home Evening, bring an abundance of the Holy Spirit into the home, and can be a protection from the temptation of the Devil.
    Sister Reeves also spoke of the protection that can come from many other worthy practices:
    1. Doing family history work and attending the temple
    Elder Richard G. Scott of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles said, in regards to participating in family history and temple work, “I can think of no greater protection from the influence of the adversary in your life” (“The Joy of Redeeming the Dead,”Ensign or Liahona, Nov. 2012, 94).
    2. Following the prophet
    President Wilford Woodruff stated: “I say to Israel, the Lord will never permit me or any other man who stands as president of the Church to lead you astray. It is not in the program. It is not in the mind of God.” (The Discourses of Wilford Woodruff, pp. 212–13.)
    3. Prayerfully studying the Book of Mormon
    The Book of Mormon - Another Testament of Jesus Christ
    Elder Boyd K Packer said, “The scriptures hold the keys to spiritual protection. They contain the doctrine and laws and ordinances that will bring each child of God to a testimony of Jesus Christ as the Savior and Redeemer.” (The Key to Spiritual Protection October 2013)
    It is the job of the parents to explain the sacred feelings given to us to use in our marriages, explain what pornography is and its dangers, set up regular times to discuss pornography with our kids, set family standards, install parental controls, and finally, make our homes safe havens by the spiritual deeds performed there. 
    Once we have done this, it is in our children’s hands to make the right choices. We have set the example and taught them the right way.We have to remember that they will be in other people’s homes. They will be around other people with different values at school and work. We can’t protect them from everything.

    For example, I used to babysit my cousins some nights while their parents were out. Their TV did not have parental controls. Once I was flipping through the channels and came across a very sexually charged movie. I was curious, the heat rose within me, and I secretly watched much of it. It was the wrong choice. I should have known better.

    Sister Reeves admonished, “Youth, take responsibility for your own spiritual well-being. Turn off your phone if necessary, sing a Primary song, pray for help, think of a scripture, walk out of a movie, picture the Savior, take the sacrament worthily, study For the Strength of Youth, be an example to your friends, confide in a parent, go see your bishop, ask for help, and seek professional counseling, if needed.”
    A person’s spiritual well-being relies on so much more than not participating in pornography. The standards must be much higher. 
    Sister Reeves mentioned the For the Strength of Youth pamphlet, a guidebook on how youth (and all of us) should live our lives to be like Christ and return to Him. One of the standards in this book is Entertainment and Media. 
    It says: Do not attend, view, or participate in anything that is vulgar, immoral, violent, or pornographic in any way. Do not participate in anything that presents immorality or violence as acceptable. Have the courage to walk out of a movie, change your music, or turn off a computer, television, or mobile device if what you see or hear drives away the Spirit. 
    I also love the counsel given by Elder Jeffrey R. Holland, an apostle in the LDS church:
    1. “Above all, start by separating yourself from people, materials, and circumstances that will harm you.”
    2. “Along with filters on computers and a lock on affections, remember that the only real control in life is self-control. If a TV show is indecent, turn it off. If a movie is crude, walk out. If an improper relationship is developing, sever it. Many of these influences, at least initially, may not technically be evil, but they can blunt our judgment, dull our spirituality, and lead to something that could be evil.”
    3. “Like thieves in the night, unwelcome thoughts can and do seek entrance to our minds…Replace lewd thoughts with hopeful images and joyful memories; picture the faces of those who love you and would be shattered if you let them down.”
    4. “Cultivate and be where the Spirit of the Lord is. Make sure that includes your own home or apartment, dictating the kind of art, music, and literature you keep there. If you are endowed, go to the temple as often as your circumstances allow. And when you leave the temple, remember the symbols you take with you, never to be set aside or forgotten.”
    Parents lead the way, and then the children make their own choices. There will be times, though, when despite all the good direction you have given your kids, that they may still develop an addiction to pornography at some point in their lives. 
    Sister Reeves gave humbling counsel: “We would be wise not to react with shock, anger, or rejection, which may cause them to be silent again.”
    The natural reaction to finding out a loved one has a pornography addiction would be all the things she said not to do. I thought about it, and even if someone is engaged in such a horrifying sin, that person is still a child of God. That person still has the ability to change and become better. By showing compassion and care, we can help the person know that the change is possible and worth it. 
    A father sitting at a kitchen table with his teenage son. The father and son are talking with each other.
    For more advice about how to respond when you find out someone you love has a pornography addiction, click here. 
    The young woman in the story may not have reacted the best at first, but she did sincerely want her husband to overcome his addiction. She wanted to save her marriage and keep her family together.
    She suffered greatly because of her husband’s addiction. It made her feel betrayed, unloved, not good enough, and defeated. 
    woman pondering
    Sister Reeves has offered words of hope to people like this young woman: “We as leaders are also greatly concerned about the spouses and families of those suffering from pornography addiction. Elder Richard G. Scott has pleaded: “If you are free of serious sin yourself, don’t suffer needlessly the consequences of another’s sins. … You can feel compassion. … Yet you should not take upon yourself a feeling of responsibility for those acts.” Know that you are not alone. There is help. Addiction recovery meetings for spouses are available, including phone-in meetings, which allow spouses to call in to a meeting and participate from their own homes.”
    Elder C. Scott Grow has also provided comfort with his words: “The Savior felt the weight of the anguish of all mankind―the anguish of sin and of sorrow. “Surely he has borne our griefs, and carried our sorrows.” Through His Atonement, He heals not only the transgressor, but He also heals the innocent who suffer because of those transgressions. As the innocent exercise faith in the Savior and in His Atonement and forgive the transgressor, they too can be healed” (“The Miracle of the Atonement,” April 2011 General Conference).
    If this young woman had realized that her husband’s addiction was not her fault, that there were support meetings for other spouses like her, that she could be healed as she exercised faith in her Savior and forgave her husband, her suffering would have been much less.
    Forgiveness. That is a very difficult thing to do when one has been betrayed so deliberately and painfully. President James E. Faust spoke about forgiveness in a way to make it more attainable. He said:
     1. Forgiveness is not always instantaneous.”
     2. “Most of us need time to work through pain and loss.”
     3. “Forgiveness comes more readily when … we have faith in God and trust in His word.”
     4. “If we will get on our knees and ask Heavenly Father for a feeling of forgiveness, He will help us.”
    Now what about the one with the pornography addiction? The young man in the story chose not to repent of his sins. He chose not to go through with the program. He chose to end his marriage. Maybe he just didn’t understand this, spoken by Sister Reeves:
    “Young people and adults, if you are caught in Satan’s trap of pornography, remember how merciful our beloved Savior is. Do you realize how deeply the Lord loves and cherishes you, even now? Our Savior has the power to cleanse and heal you. He can remove the pain and sorrow you feel and make you clean again through the power of His Atonement…He has paid the price for our sins, but we must kneel before our Father in Heaven, in deep humility, confessing our sins, and plead with Him for forgiveness. We must want to change our hearts and our desires and be humble enough to seek the help and forgiveness of those we may have hurt or forsaken.”

    No, as a youth, this young man must not have realized he had to repent to really get over his pornography addiction. Then as an adult facing divorce, he must not have known that forgiveness and purity was within his reach if he would only reach out to his Savior.

    There are so many wonderful resources to help those affected by pornography addictions. Anyone with an addiction, or spouses and family of one with an addiction, can find live or phone support meeting schedules at addictionrecovery.lds.org.    
    Much of the information I put in this blog post came from overcomingpornography.org. It is a site dedicated to educating, preventing, dealing, and healing. Everything you need to know about how to teach your children correct principles is there. Advice for how to safeguard your home is there. The signs of a pornography addiction are there. It is all there. Most importantly, this site is meant to help you or a loved one overcome pornography through the atonement of Jesus Christ. 
    Only Jesus Christ can make us clean. Only through Him can we live with our Father in Heaven again.
    Perhaps someday the young man in the story will feel Christ’s outstretched arms, beckoning him back, reaching to him, yearning to pull him into a warm, loving embrace.
    God bless this young man, and any other person who has fallen into Satan’s trap of pornography. It is not too late for you. You can overcome. You can find peace. You can be pure again. All you have to do is trust in the Lord. 

  • Pioneer: One that goes before, showing others the way to follow.

    Every year on July 24, members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (Mormons) celebrate Pioneer Day, the anniversary of the day that the first Mormon pioneers arrived in the Salt Lake Valley in 1847. It is a day to honor and remember the faith, courage, sacrifice, and perseverance of the early members of the church.
    The early Saints were such powerful examples of putting God first and following His will no matter what the circumstances. They endured more hardships than most could ever imagine, fearing for their lives, being driven from place to place, grieving over the martyrdom of their beloved prophet, and traveling hundreds of miles by foot (some with only handcarts in the bitter cold of winter), to finally find a resting place where they could worship the Lord, Jesus Christ, in peace.
    A pioneer is one that goes before, showing others the way to follow. Because of their commitment, unity, faith and selflessness, the pioneers paved a way for millions to find the joy and truth they had received.
    There is so much to be learned from these Mormon pioneers, and they actually still exist today. They don’t deal with the same hardships, but Mormons from all over the world strive to follow Jesus Christ as valiantly as the faithful men, women and children who crossed the plains.
    I love this video narrated by Elder Dallin H. Oaks, an apostle in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. He speaks of the idea of modern-day Mormon pioneers.
    One definition of a modern Mormon pioneer is one who is the first member of his/her family to join the LDS church.
    My husband, Jad, is one of these pioneers. He grew up in Jordan with a very large family, all who affiliated
    themselves with the teachings and traditions of the same Christian religion.
    Throughout his childhood, Jad had many questions. He would look up at the stars and wonder where he came from and what the purpose of life was.
    When he was about 9 or 10, he asked a priest these questions. He was quickly rebuked saying that he should not ask such questions as they would make him crazy.
    When Jad sadly learned that there were no answers to his questions, he slowly slipped away from his religion and
    God. He finally denounced religion all together when he stopped attending his Christian school at age 15.
    In his early adult years, after graduating from college in Jordan, he moved to the United States for a business opportunity with his uncle. A few years later, his friend told him of another opportunity in North Carolina.
    One night as he walked through Wal-Mart to shop for his store, he saw two young women and walked up to them. They were kind to him and invited him to a party. He accepted and was excited to attend.
    When Jad arrived at the party, he noticed it was much different than he expected. It was a family party, celebrating with family members who would soon move away. He stayed, though, and accepted an invitation to visit this family’s church, called The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
    That Sunday he met many new, smiling faces. He felt good as he listened to the children of the congregation put on a musical presentation. He left church with an invitation to help someone in the congregation who needed a ramp built for his home.
    This was Jad’s first experience with the Mormon Church, but not the last. Over the course of the next nine months he would attend church every Sunday. He would have the missionaries in his home on a weekly basis, and feed them each time.
    He was full of questions, and sometimes skepticism. He asked for a long time that the missionaries only answer his questions through Bible verses. They were always able to do so.
    After one lesson with the missionaries, they challenged Jad to not drink the next time he went out socially. He took the challenge, and he was surprised at how different everyone acted when intoxicated. He didn’t like it. So, even though for years Jad had drank nearly every night, he never did again after that experience.
    Not everything came so easily for Jad, though. He found many Mormon beliefs to be strange, but he kept listening
    and studying and spending time with the members and missionaries.
    Though he resisted with his brain, his heart could not sever him from the church. Even when members of his family presented him with anti-Mormon materials to read and view, he did not stop investigating.
    Through the months he investigated the church, Jad got many answers to questions. The teachings of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints made sense. It all made sense, but he was nervous it was too good to be true.
    One night, he prayed to Heavenly Father and told Him that if He answered Jad’s prayers on behalf of his friend, himself and his uncle, all with different needs, that he would know the church was true, and that he would join.
    The next morning, after talking to these two individuals that he had prayed about the night before, he joyfully
    realized that his prayers had indeed been answered. Jad knew that he would then accept the invitation to be baptized into The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
    He was baptized on his birthday, July 22, 2008. Soon he was called upon to be a ward missionary in his congregation, and then the ward mission leader.
    Jad had a testimony, and felt happy in his new faith. The questions he had had his whole life were answered. He still had more questions, though, and kept asking.
    Over time, Jad gained a stronger testimony of things that weren’t as clear when he got baptized. After the first General Conference he viewed, he knew that there was a living prophet. When he paid an honest tithe, he gained a testimony of tithing.
    Jad’s change of lifestyle, faith, and heart did not come without its struggles. Several members of his family ridiculed
    him for changing his lifestyle and no longer following the traditions he had always known. His own brother told him he would never talk to him again, though has since changed that stance.
    For the last six years, however, Jad has remained true to his baptismal covenants. He has tried his best to stand as a witness of God at all times and in all things and in all places (Mosiah 18:9).
    He has had numerous conversations with members of his family about the faith that he loves so dearly. He tries to set a good example for them, and help them find the full truth of the gospel of Jesus Christ. He has not given up, and will never do so. The gospel means that much to him.
    Jad and I truly believe that he was meant to live in the United States so that he could find the restored gospel of Jesus Christ. He never meant to live here, but instead wanted to be a pilot in Jordan. But, he is now one of very few Arabic members of the church. We believe that he has a great opportunity to help spread forth the kingdom of God
    to those of his heritage.
    Jad Al-Bjaly is a modern-day pioneer.
     Many members of our church have a long line of members in their family. However, all Mormons can be pioneers as
    they stand for what is right even when it isn’t popular, when they live their lives in service to God and to their fellow men, and when they share the light they have with others.
    Last Sunday, our worship services began with talks about the growth of the church in the Hillsborough and Mebane areas over the last several decades. Members of the church that grew up in these areas prayed and hoped for many years for an LDS chapel to be built closer to them so they could better serve and worship the Lord. That day has come.
    At the end of the meeting, our stake president gave a heartfelt and beautiful dedicatory prayer. The greatest desire emanated from the prayer was that the church members would work diligently with the missionaries, and dedicate their efforts to lovingly and boldly sharing their testimonies and spiritual knowledge with others. By so doing, our
    new church building can be filled with new faces to love and nourish with the good word of God.
    Mormons see beauty and truth in all religions, with respect for them all. We believe that there is much truth in all Christian religions about Jesus Christ and His gospel. The difference is that we believe that our church is the same church that Jesus established on the earth, with the same doctrines, the same priesthood authority, with the same focus on living the commandments as He presented them himself. We believe that God still speaks to a prophet today, and that we don’t have to be confused in today’s increasingly wicked world. We believe in loving and serving others every day of our lives, and we want with all of our hearts to share this joy and fulfillment that we enjoy every day.
    Every single member of the church who shares this light with others, in hopes that they join with us, is also a modern-day pioneer.
    I am a modern-day pioneer. My blog is dedicated to sharing my testimony, my faith, my hope with each of you. I want every person in this world to have the blessings of eternal families. I want everyone to know that God loves them and knows them. I want everyone to know what my husband wondered – where they came from and what this life is for.
    Another apostle of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, Elder Neil L. Andersen, narrated a very spiritual video about pioneers, old and new, and about their love for their Savior, Jesus Christ. Please watch it. I promise it
    will touch your heart, as it does mine each time I watch it.
    President Gordon B. Hinckley, our beloved prophet from 1995-2008, said, “We honor best those who have gone before when we serve well in the cause of truth.”
    Elder Oaks expounded on this by saying, “That cause of truth is the cause of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, whose servants they were, and whose servants we should strive to be.”
    I strive every day of my life to be the Lord’s servant. As the song “True to the Faith” says,
    True to the faith that our parents have cherished,
    True to the truth for which martyrs have perished,
    To God’s command, Soul, heart, and hand,
    Faithful and true we will ever stand.
    Faithful and true I will ever stand – soul, heart and hand. I am a modern-day pioneer. Thank you to all of you who are and will someday become a modern-day Mormon pioneer. May God bless you in your zeal and devotion to the cause of truth.

     

     

  • Gratitude can change your life for the best

    I shared this talk in my church congregation on December 17, 2006, not long after the hardest experiences I have ever had in my life up until that point, and probably ever in my life, until now.

    The talk’s topic was gratitude. I always thought that it was an inspired topic, for through studying it was I able to find some peace and a greater awareness of all of the gifts Heavenly Father has given me.

    I came across this talk today for the first time since 2006, and I thought that it might help someone who has been going through tough times, and is having a difficult time seeing God’s hand and feeling His love.

    Talk on Gratitude
    Doctrine and Covenants 59:21 reads, “And in nothing doth man offend God, or against none
    is his wrath kindled, save those who confess not his hand in all things, and obey not his commandments.” President James E. Faust said that this is “more than a social courtesy; it is a binding commandment.” Lastly, 1 Thessalonians 5:18 reads, “In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you.”
    These statements are very clear. We must show gratitude for every occurrence and aspect of our lives.
    Much of this total gratitude includes our blessings. All of us are different and come from different backgrounds, but nevertheless all receive and have received countless blessings in our lives. Doctrine and Covenants 46:32 reads, “And ye must give thanks to God in the Spirit for whatsoever blessing ye are blessed with.”
    We have so many things to be thankful for. The well-known and beautiful primary song, “My Heavenly Father Loves Me,” illustrates gratitude for nature and our senses.
    Whenever I hear the song of a bird, or look at the blue, blue sky.
    Whenever I feel the rain on my face, or the wind as it rushes by.
    Whenever I touch a velvet rose, or walk by a lilac tree,
    I’m glad that I live in this beautiful world Heavenly Father created for me.
    He gave me my eyes that I might see the color of butterfly wings.
    He gave me my ears that I might hear the magical sound of things.
    He gave me my life, my mind, my heart, I thank him reverently
    for all his creations of which I’m a part. Yes, I know Heavenly Father loves me.
     
    In addition to nature and creations, some of our greatest blessings in life include the people that we love and respect, such as family, friends, teachers, mentors, and leaders. Without our relationships, we would be empty souls, hungry for love, acceptance, guidance, and companionship. The hymn “Each Life that Touches Ours for Good” perfectly reflects the positive impact of strong relationships with others. The first verse reads:
    Each life that touches ours for good, reflects thine own great mercy, Lord.
    Thou sendest blessings from above through words and deeds of those who love.
    In this church, we are also especially grateful for the gospel and the resources we have to help us better learn of Christ and our Father in Heaven. We have the scriptures, beautiful hymns, missionaries, a wonderful prophet and general authorities, temples, church magazines, and there are so many other resources that we enjoy. We must
    ask ourselves where we would be without the knowledge that Jesus Christ is our Savior, that the Father sent him down to earth to atone for the sins of the world, that we may be forgiven of our sins and receive eternal life.
    At this time of year we reflect on Jesus’ birth. John 3:16 reads:
    For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son,
    that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.
    President Hinckley declared,
    We love him. We honor him. We thank him. We worship him. He has done for each of us and for all mankind that which none other could have done. God be thanked for the gift of his Beloved Son, our Savior, the Redeemer of the world, the Lamb without blemish who was offered as a sacrifice for all mankind. Christ was the ultimate gift and blessing, and there are countless other blessings that we as individuals enjoy, including health, prosperity, education, accomplishments, and freedoms, along with many others.
    It is easy to see our blessings and have grateful minds when our lives are going well.  There are times, however, when we go through intense and difficult trials. During these times we may waver about our faith, see only the negative, complain, criticize, and place blame. At these times in our lives, it is difficult to have positive attitudes, least of all to feel grateful to our Lord for our blessings. Our problems seem to much outweigh any goodness in our lives. There is hope for these feelings of doubt and despair. We can still be happy despite our trials.
    One way to do this is to have a positive attitude; see the beauty in the darkness. President Monson
    offers this excellent insight:
    We can lift ourselves, and others as well, when we refuse to remain in the realm of negative thought and cultivate within our hearts an attitude of gratitude. If ingratitude be numbered among the serious sins, then gratitude takes its place among the noblest of virtues.
    Some recognition of blessings will come during the course of the trial, and other recognition may come after the trial as you notice its positive outcomes.
    I think this talk was meant for me because this year of my life was the hardest that I have ever had to bear. This year I got divorced from my eternal companion, moved across the country, had to start my life completely over with friends, work, living arrangements, not to mention that I lost my in-laws and friends. That sounds pretty bad, and it is if you look at if from a negative perspective. But, even though my marriage failed, I am glad for the experience that it brought to my life. I have my beautiful son, who I love more than anything in the world. When I look at him, I see God’s divine hand in my life. During my two years of marriage I also had security, wonderful people to call my in-laws, my beautiful primary children whom I would not have taught if I hadn’t of been married and in a family ward.
    The most important thing I got out of my marriage was growth as an individual. I strengthened myself in ways of tolerance, forgiveness, communication skills, enduring to the end, hard work, love, and devotion. I went through my divorce during my last semester at SUU. That was a very difficult semester, but I did receive many blessings during that time. The sheer fact that I was able to graduate from college with high honors when I had a baby, family, work, church, and a divorce to worry about on top of school was a miracle in itself.
    My life since I have moved to North Carolina has been hard too, but I have had so many blessings. I have a loving family who helps me with everything I need, even though  I know sometimes Casey and I are a hardship; my ex-husband and I are friends and we keep in contact; I have made many friends in this ward, and I am so grateful for how many of you have opened your hearts to Casey. I am grateful that even though I will soon have to put my son in someone else’s care while I work, that he will be with a loving caregiver who has a son his age. Everything is going to be okay in my life. I just need to focus on the positive.
    The song “Count your Blessings” helps us to change our attitude and build our faith of enduring trials. The first two verses read:
    When upon life’s billows you are tempest tossed, when you are discouraged thinking all is lost,
    count your many blessings, name them one by one, and it will surprise you what the Lord has done.
    Are you ever burdened with a load of care? Does the cross seem heavy you are called to bear?
    Count your many blessings, every doubt will fly, and you will be singing as the days go by.
     In the field of communication there is a theory dealing with costs and rewards. When a relationship brings more costs than rewards to our lives, we will end the relationship. But I testify to you today that no matter how many trials we have to face, in our relationship with the Savior, the rewards will always be higher than the costs. So, coming to the Lord in prayer, asking for help in your trials is perhaps the best way to have the strength to live life positively and
    with a grateful heart.
    Alma 37:37 reads:
    Counsel with the Lord in all thy doings, and he will direct thee for good;
    yea, when thou liest down at night, lie down unto the Lord, that he may watch over you in your sleep;
    and when thou risest in the morning let thy heart be full of thanks unto God;
    and if ye do these things, ye shall be lifted up at the last day.
    We shall be exalted if we come unto Christ and thank him for all that he does for us in our every day lives. There is nothing greater for which we can be thankful.
    To show God how much we love him, we should serve others. These kind acts will also help us to overlook our own struggles by helping others with theirs. You could be the answer to someone else’s prayer and not even know it. You can stimulate gratitude in others through pure love and service. To show our gratitude to our Father in Heaven and Jesus Christ we should be mindful of our brethren just as they are mindful of us. Then we can find joy in our sometimes dreary lives.
    We now know that we must be grateful for all things and thus we need to show this gratitude. The simplest way is just to say it. President Hinckley said:
    There are two little words in the English language that perhaps mean more than all others.
    They are “thank you.”
    President Monson counsels:
    “Think to thank. In these three words is the finest capsule course for a happy marriage, a formula for enduring friendship, and a pattern for personal happiness.”
    In Luke 17 we read about the ten lepers. Christ showed them the way to be healed, and only one of the ten lepers came back to thank him. Jesus said to the Samaritan:
    Were there not ten cleansed? But where are the nine? There are not found that returned to give glory to God, save this stranger. And he said unto him, Arise and go thy way: thy faith hath made thee whole.
    The man who expressed his gratitude received Christ’s blessing, and the others’ ingratitude resulted only in disappointment.
    We can express our gratitude to our Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ in our prayers, and also in our actions.
    President Monson offers this plea:
    Let us follow Him. Let us emulate his example. Let us obey His word.
    By so doing, we give to Him the divine gift of gratitude.
    Jesus himself said in John 14:21:
    He that hath my commandments and keepeth them, he it is that loveth me.
    We should also use the gospel resources that we have been given, such as studying the scriptures, praying, sustaining church leaders, paying our tithing and fast offering, singing hymns, going to the temple, and doing family history.
    We should show our gratitude to those who serve us on the earth. We can write thank you notes, make phone calls, show affection, and spend time with people. Remember, that even if someone does something for you that may not be exactly what you wanted, still show excitement and gratitude because that person worked really hard to make you happy. Also try not to take those who serve you for granted. Say thank you to your family, friends, and all others for everything, even the small things.
    I’d like to leave you with two quotes. The first was given by President Harold B. Lee:
    Life is God’s gift to man. What we do with our life is our gift to God.
    Doctrine and Covenants 78:19 reads:
    And he who receiveth all things with thankfulness shall be made glorious;
    and the things of this earth shall be added unto him, even an hundred fold, yea, more.
     What a promise. Just showing gratitude can bring about so many wonderful blessings. I am thankful so much for this ward and for your kindness to Casey and me. I hope that we can all remember Christ and his infinite love for each of us.

  • Are Mormons Christians: A question that can only be answered by a Mormon

    I remember like it was yesterday sitting in my 9th grade history class. We were studying different Christian religions and my teacher brought up Mormons. A boy in class, one I happened to have a crush on at the time, shook his head and said, “Mormons aren’t Christians. They wrote their own book.” I, a 14-year-old Mormon girl, was too afraid to raise my hand and correct him. I will never forget that day.

    To make up for it now, I would like to write about how Mormons are truly Christian people.

    What is a Christian? Well, a Christian is a person who believes in the divinity of Jesus Christ as the son of God and Savior of the world, and who strives throughout his/her life to follow Christ’s teachings and example.

    Since I was a little girl, I have grown up believing in Jesus Christ as my Savior. My whole life I have been taught how to follow Christ, and each day I try to do that more and more. For those of you who don’t know much about Mormons, I would love to expound upon how we are Christians:

    • Jesus Christ is the head of our church and the center of it.

    The Prophet Joseph Smith taught, “The fundamental principles of our religion are … concerning Jesus Christ, that He died, was buried, and rose again the third day, and ascended into heaven; and all other things which pertain to our religion are only appendages to it.”

    Lord Jesus Christ, Our Savior
    • The name of our church is The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
    • Mormon meetinghouses, homes and temples are adorned with pictures of Christ.
    • Each Sunday, in our church congregations, Mormons administer and partake of the Sacrament (Communion) to remember Christ’s body and blood. We promise to always remember Him.
    • We pray to Heavenly Father in the name of Jesus Christ. We pray before every meal, before every church activity, every morning and every night. We also strive to always have a prayer in our hearts.
    • Mormons are baptized by immersion in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost. The immersion symbolizes Christ’s death and resurrection, and represents the end of one’s past life and the beginning of one’s new spiritual life. When we are baptized, we promise to take upon us the name of Christ, bear one another’s burdens, and stand as witnesses of God at all times and in all things and in all places.
    • Mormons believe in loving all people as children of God, which includes finding good in all people, forgiving others, being kind to others, and not judging others. We also spend much of our lives in service to our neighbors, friends and families.
    • Our church has a very large humanitarian aid program. Since it started keeping track in 1985, it has donated more than $1 billion in cash and material assistance to 167 different countries in need of humanitarian aid.
    • Many members of our church choose to serve missions around the world where they spread the good news of the gospel of Jesus Christ. Though not all members serve official missions, all members strive to share the gospel of Jesus Christ from day to day, through example and in natural conversation.
    • Mormons study and read the Bible throughout their lives, and copies of the Bible can be found in our churches, homes and temples.
    • Mormons strive throughout their lives to keep God’s commandments – not just the ten commandments, but the higher law Christ taught.  We know that to truly love God and to live with Him again, we must follow all of His commandments.
    • We seek forgiveness throughout our lives for our sins through the atonement of Jesus Christ and strive throughout our lives to be more like Him. We know that He is the only way to have eternal life with our Father in Heaven.

     Now, what about this book that my high school friend said Mormons wrote? Well, he was referring to the Book of Mormon: Another Testament of Jesus Christ. It is true that Mormons read, study and ponder this book along with the Bible our entire lives. It is true that Mormons believe this is the truest book on earth. We don’t believe it is the truest book on earth because an expert in Christianity wrote it. Joseph Smith actually only had a third grade education. No, we believe that it is actual scripture written by prophets living in ancient America, starting 600 years before Christ. In one of the books in the Book of Mormon, the resurrected Jesus Christ appears to the people there and preaches what He had taught in his mortal ministry. You can read more about the Book of Mormon here, request a free copy here, or read the book electronically here. In its more than six thousand verses, the Book of Mormon refers to Jesus Christ almost four thousand times and by over one hundred different names. Please refer to my blog post about the Book of Mormon, and 100 things it has taught me here.

    I mentioned a man named Joseph Smith. Some believe Mormons worship Joseph Smith. This is not the case, though we highly revere him. He was the first prophet of our church. The story of how our church came to exist, as well as how the Book of Mormon came into existence, is a long one. I cannot tell it as well as Joseph Smith himself.

     

    Joseph Smith, we believe, was a prophet of God. A prophet of God leads our church today. His name is Thomas S. Monson, and we believe that he receives revelation from God to lead His church on the earth. We believe that our church is the same church that existed when Christ was on the earth. Just as in Christ’s time, we have prophets, apostles, temples, and the priesthood.

     

    Based on the definition of what a Christian is, Mormons are definitely Christians. However, we have additional doctrines and practices not familiar to other Christian churches. This is why many Christians say we are not Christians. I will not personally address these issues, but if you would like to read about them, you may find these articles of interest:

    There is also an official statement written by Mormon apostles and prophets regarding our beliefs about Christ.

     

    As for me, I love Jesus Christ with all of my heart. I am grateful for Him. I know that He was born of a virgin in the most humble beginnings. I know He led a perfect life of love, kindness, forgiveness, and service. He truly taught us the way to live to return to our Father in Heaven. I know He suffered for our pains and sins in the Garden of Gethsemane. There He paid the price for all of us. Because He suffered, we wouldn’t have to, but instead, through Him, could repent of our sins and become clean.  His atonement is infinite and we can use it all our lives, not only for repentance, but also for healing when we go through difficult times, and for spiritual strength to press forward in an increasingly wicked world. I know that Jesus died on the cross and rose on the third day. Because he died and was resurrected, we can all be resurrected to our perfect form. I know Jesus knows my name, and your name. I know He loves us all equally and wants all of us to succeed. He, along with Heavenly Father and the Holy Ghost, are united in helping us attain eternal life. I know if I remain faithful in my heart, in my words and in my deeds, this can be so.

    Yes, Mormons are Christians. Out of all hats we wear, out of all things we define ourselves by, most importantly, we are children of God.

    Much love,
    Mandy Al-Bjaly

    http://mormon.org/me/5RNJ

  • 100 Things the Book of Mormon Has Taught Me

    Last week I completed my fourth and final semester studying the Book of Mormon, along with other sisters who I have come to love dearly. The first two semesters, I was blessed to be taught by a wonderful sister. Then the last two semesters, I had the blessed responsibility of teaching the class. In both roles, I grew as a person and as a daughter of God. I also learned to love the Book of Mormon more than I ever had before in my life.

    I want to share with you 100 beautiful truths from the Book of Mormon that have helped, and continue to help me, in my journey to be more like my Savior.

    1. The Lord provides a way for us to follow His commands (1 Nephi 3:7).
    2. The Lord can do all things for us, that are His will,  if we have faith in Him (1 Nephi 7:12).
    3. Sometimes the Lord commands us to do things for a purpose we don’t understand (1 Nephi 9:5).
    4. If we listen to the word of God, and follow it, the devil can’t overpower us (1 Nephi 15:24).
    5. We receive strength as we obey God’s commandments (1 Nephi 17:3).
    6. Regardless of our afflictions, we should praise God and not murmur (1 Nephi 18:16).
    7. Jesus Christ offered himself as a sacrifice for sin. Only through His mercy and grace, can those who believe return to God’s presence (2 Nephi 2:6-8).
    8. Everything must have its opposite. You cannot have one without the other (2 Nephi 2:11-13).
    9. We all have our free agency to choose to follow Christ or the devil (2 Nephi 2:27, 2 Nephi 10:23).
    10. Those who trust man instead of God are cursed (2 Nephi 4:34).
    11. The Lord admonishes us to listen to Him and not be afraid of men, for they die. The Lord and His righteousness are forever (2 Nephi 8:7-8, 12).
    12. The Lord will bless you and give you knowledge if you are humble. He despises those who  value riches and knowledge of men more than His counsel (2 Nephi 9:28-30, 42).
    13.  We are saved by grace after all we can do (2 Nephi 25:23).
    14. People will say they have a bible and don’t need another bible. The Lord answers by saying He loves His people all over the world and He will visit all nations after His resurrection. A written testimony of two nations is a witness of Him, and that He remembers all nations (2 Nephi 29:-78).
    15. The Lamb of God was holy, yet He was baptized to fulfill all righteousness. We who are unholy, must be baptized to show obedience to God and His commandments (2 Nephi 31:5-7).
    16. After we are baptized, we still have work to do to receive eternal life. We must stay faithful, love God and our neighbors, follow the word of Christ, etc. (2 Nephi 19-20).
    17. After we are baptized and receive the gift of the Holy Ghost, we can speak by the power of the Holy Ghost. As we study our scriptures, we will know what we should do (2 Nephi 32:2-3, 5).
    18. Pray always. Don’t do anything unto the Lord without praying first for help (2 Nephi 32:9).
    19. Seek for the kingdom of God before you seek for riches. If you do obtain riches, use them to do good to others, for we are all precious to God (Jacob 2:18-21).
    20. When we serve others, we are serving God. If we praise, thank and serve God all our lives with our whole souls, we will still be unprofitable servants. All we have to do is keep His commandments, and we are blessed. We will always be indebted to Christ, and have no reason to ever boast of ourselves (Mosiah 2:17, 20-24).
    21. We must be like little children and put off the natural man, else we are an enemy to God (Mosiah 3:18-19).
    22. God created all things, has all wisdom, and all power. We can’t comprehend what He can (Mosiah 4:9).
    23. We should teach our children to keep God’s commandments and to love and serve others. We should not withhold our help from those who need it, saying they deserve what they get. We are all beggars and rely on God for all (Mosiah 4:14-19).
    24. We must watch our thoughts, words and deeds, and keep God’s commandments, else we will perish (Mosiah 4:30).
    25. When we are baptized, we make a covenant to be obedient to all of God’s commands, all our lives. When we make this covenant, we are called the children of Christ. We must remember Him always. How can we know Him if we do not serve Him and keep Him in our hearts? (Mosiah 4:5-13).
    26. When we are baptized, we promise to stand as witnesses of God at all times and in all things and in all places (Mosiah 18:9).
    27. The Lord will forgive those who repent. We should forgive each other as well. If we don’t, then we will not be forgiven of our sins (Mosiah 26:30-31).
    28. The judgments of God are always just, but the judgments of man are not (Mosiah 29:12).
    29. Alma asks many questions to see if his people are prepared for salvation. These are great questions to ponder and see how you are doing in your path of righteousness (Alma 5:14-32).
    30. The word of God must be fulfilled, regardless if people reject it (Alma 5:58).
    31. To walk blameless before God, we must be humble, gentle, patient, grateful, etc (Alma 7:23-24).
    32. Christ has loosed the bands of temporal death. All will be resurrected (Alma 11:43-44).
    33. Those with soft hearts receive more of God’s word than those who harden their hearts (Alma 12:10).
    34. This life is a time to prepare to meet God (Alma 12:24).
    35. Do not procrastinate the day of your repentance, but instead watch and pray continually and have faith, and a hope of eternal life. (Alma 13:27-30)
    36. Who can glory too much in the Lord? (Alma 26:16).
    37. God is mindful of all people and is merciful unto them (Alma 26:37).
    38. What profit is it to labor in a church if you don’t get paid? It is to rejoice in the joy of others (Alma 30:34-35).
    39. All things denote there is a God (Alma 30:44).
    40. The Lord provides strength, comfort and patience to those who suffer afflictions, as long as they pray in faith (Alma 31:30-38).
    41. It is better to humble yourself because of God’s word than to be compelled to be humble (Alma 32:12-16).
    42. Faith is not to have a perfect knowledge, but a hope for things which are not seen, which are true (Alma 32:21).
    43. Faith begins with a desire to believe. Alma the younger, a prophet, compares the word of God unto a seed and explains how it can grow and bring forth fruit to you (Alma 32:27-43).
    44. By small and simple things God brings about great things, including the salvation of souls (Alma 37:6-7).
    45.  The Lord keeps His promises, and always has (Alma 37:17).
    46. If you counsel with the Lord, He will direct you. Those who pray daily and have hearts filled with gratitude daily will be lifted up at the last day (Alma 37:37).
    47. You cannot hide your crimes from God. You must repent of your sins (Alma 39:8).
    48. Do not seek after riches, for you can’t take them with you (Alma 39:14).
    49. Wickedness never was happiness. Those who do not follow God cannot be happy (Alma 41:10-11).
    50. Christ’s atonement has brought about the plan of mercy and appeases the demands of justice by allowing us to repent of our sins (Alma 42:13-15).
    51. War is justified to protect families, lands, rights and religion (Alma 43:46-47).
    52. God will preserve the faithful. The Lord will not allow a people to be destroyed unless they fall into transgression and deny their faith (Alma 44:4).
    53. Captain Moroni’s character is explained, and then it issaid that if all people were like him, the devil could have no power over anyone (Alma 48:11-13, 17).
    54. If you do not doubt, God will deliver you from your enemies (Alma 56:47-48).
    55. Joy  and pureness of heart comes from humility and giving your heart to God (Helaman 3:35).
    56. If you build your foundation on the rock of Christ, the devil cannot drag you  down into misery and despair. Those who build a sure foundation cannot fall (Helaman 5:12).
    57. Samuel, a Lamanite prophet, prophesies that the night before Christ is born, there will be no darkness, but a day and a night and a day of only light. A new star will arise and signs and wonders will come from Heaven (Helaman 14:3-6).
    58. Jesus must die so that the dead can be resurrected. His death redeems mankind and, through repentance, allows all to enter back into the presence of God (Helaman 14: 15-18).
    59. Samuel prophesies that upon Christ’s death, there will be darkness until He is resurrected. During this period of darkness, there will be terrible natural disasters, changing the face of the whole earth, above and beneath (Helaman 14:20-27).
    60. The words of the prophets are fulfilled every whit (3 Nephi 1:20).
    61. Christ extends His mercy to all who come to Him (3 Nephi 9:14).
    62. Heavenly Father speaks to the Nephites in the land Bountiful, and testifies of His beloved son. Jesus descends out of heaven and stands in their midst. He speaks of his atoning sacrifice and invites the multitude to thrust their hands into His side, and feel the prints in His hands and feet (3 Nephi 11:7-15).
    63. Jesus instructs the prophet Nephi on how baptism should be done – in His name, having proper authority, and by immersion (3 Nephi 11:21-26).
    64. Contention and anger are of the devil (3 Nephi 11:29-30).
    65. Jesus speaks the Beatitudes to the Nephites, just as He did at the Sermon on the Mount (3 Nephi
    12:3-12).
    66. The Father knows what you need before you ask Him (3 Nephi 13:8).
    67. If you first seek the kingdom of Heaven, you will be blessed with your temporal needs (3 Nephi 13:33).
    68. Do not judge others. First look at yourself and what you need to change before you point out others’ faults (3 Nephi 14:1-5).
    69. Only those who do the will of the Father will enter the kingdom of Heaven (3 Nephi 14:21).
    70. When Christ told the Jews that He had other sheep which were not of this fold, they thought He meant the Gentiles. However, Jesus tells the Nephites that this is not so; that the other sheep are them and other people around the world that He would visit after His resurrection  (3 Nephi 15:16-24).
    71. Just as in His mortal ministry, Jesus, full of compassion, heals the sick. He then blesses the children one by one and prays for them. Angels descend out of heaven and minister to the little ones (3 Nephi 17:6-25).
    72. Jesus ordains a disciple with power to bless and administer the bread and wine to all those who are baptized in His name. Partaking of the bread and wine shows Heavenly Father that we remember Jesus and keep His commandments. He promises that if the people remember Him, they will always have His Spirit to be with them. Those who partake worthily of these emblems are built upon His rock (3 Nephi 18:5-12).
    73. Jesus commands us to watch and pray always to avoid temptation. Satan want to overtake us. Anything we ask the Father in Christ’s name will be given to us as long as we ask in faith and it is God’s will. Jesus commands us to pray in our families (3 Nephi 18:15-21).
    74. Jesus says to meet together often and to accept all people into the congregation of the church. Pray for them. Set an example for them, as He has set for us (3 Nephi 18:22-24).
    75. The words of Isaiah are great, and all things that he prophesied have been and shall be (3 Nephi 23:1-3).
    76. Jesus Christ’s church should bear His name, and should be built upon His gospel, or else it be another man’s church (3 Nephi 27:3-8).
    77. All will be judged by Jesus Christ according to their works. All who repent, are baptized, and endure to the end will be held guiltless before the Father on judgment day (3 Nephi 27:13-17).
    78. We should do what Jesus would and did do. We should be like Him (3 Nephi 27:21, 27).
    79. The way to eternal life is strait and narrow. Few will find it (3 Nephi 27:33).
    80. The judgments of God will overtake the wicked. (Mormon 4:5).
    81. The Book of Mormon shall be hidden until the Lord sees fit for it to be brought forth. Its purpose will be to persuade the House of Israel that Jesus is the Christ, the son of God (Mormon 5:12-14).
    82. God has all power, and at His command anything can come to pass (Mormon 5:23).
    83. Mormon invites the Lamanites of the latter days to repent, to be baptized and to take hold of the gospel of Christ, set forth in the Bible and the Book of Mormon. The Book of Mormon is written to help people believe in the Bible. If you will believe the Bible, you will believe the Book of Mormon too (Mormon 7:8-9).
    84. Moroni prophesies about the coming forth of the Book of Mormon. It will only be able to come forth by the power of God by one whose eye is single to His glory. It shall come forth in a time where people no longer believe in miracles, when churches and teachers are lifted up in pride, when there are wars and rumors of wars, great pollutions and sin upon the earth, etc. (Mormon 8:14-33).
    85. Miracles have not ceased. Because God is the same yesterday, today and forever, miracles still happen for the faithful. They only cease for the wicked (Mormon 9:15-21).
    86. The promised land (the Americas) will be free from bondage from all other nations as long as its people serve Jesus Christ (Ether 2:9-10, 12).
    87. Anything that persuades to do good is from God (Ether 4:12).
    88. Do not say something doesn’t exist because you can’t see it or have proof. You will not receive a witness until after your faith is tried  (Ether 12: 6).
    89. Miracles only occur when one first has faith in the son of God (Ether 12:12-18).
    90. God gives us weakness so we will be humble. If we are humble and have faith, God will make our weaknesses strengths (Ether 12:27).
    91. In the church of Christ, members will fellowship each other and help each other keep the faith. They will meet often to fast, pray, help each other, and to partake of the Sacrament in remembrance of the Lord, Jesus Christ (Moroni 6:4-6).
    92. A good person will do good things. When offering a gift or praying, we must do so with real intent to do good (Moroni 7: 5-10).
    93. All things of God invite one to do good. We all have been given the light of Christ, which helps us discern between good and evil. The devil never persuades anyone to do good (Moroni 7:12-17).
    94. We must have charity. It is the pure love of Christ, and never fails. We must pray to the Father to be filled with His love, and be like Christ (Moroni 7:45-48).
    95. Little children are not capable of committing sin. They are not accountable and need no repentance. Thus, they do not need to be baptized. They are alive in Christ (Moroni 8).
    96. Perfect love removes all fear (Moroni 8:16).
    97. As we are forgiven of our sins, we become more gentle and not easily offended. With these traits, we are filled with the Holy Ghost, which brings hope and perfect love. This love can endure through diligent prayer (Moroni 8:26).
    98. Moroni promises that those who ask Heavenly Father in sincere, faithful prayer if the Book of Mormon is true, will receive an answer through the Holy Ghost, who testifies of all truth (Moroni 10:4-5).
    99. God has given us many different spiritual gifts. They are manifested to us by the Holy Spirit to help us and others draw closer to Christ (Moroni 10:8-18).
    100. If we come unto Christ and deny ourselves of all ungodliness, loving the Lord with all our hearts, we can be perfected and made holy through His grace (Moroni 10:32-33).

    This is by no means an all-inclusive list. There are hundreds, if not thousands, of precious truths we can pull from this perfect book. Throughout it, we read of  prophets of God who were courageous, bold, true, always obedient, filled with love for their brethren, all having a pure love of God and a desire to share His light and gospel with others.

    The most perfect example from the Book of Mormon is Jesus Christ Himself. The words he spoke to the Nephite people, whom He visited in the Americas following His resurrection, are of supreme value.

    As I went through the Book of Mormon’s 531 pages, making this list, I was overwhelmed with how often Jesus Christ is mentioned, praised, prophesied of, and reverenced. The Book of Mormon truly is a companion to the Bible – another testament of Jesus Christ.


    I know it is true. I invite you to read it and to pray about it to see if it is true for yourself. Let the Spirit of the Lord work within you, and testify to you of its truthfulness.

    You can read it online here or you can request a free hard copy here.

    Of all the self-help books you could ever choose to read, choose The Book of Mormon.

    ***This post is featured in my new book, Likening the Book of Mormon War Chapters to Your Life: A Study Journal. Like this post, my book was inspired in part by the class that I was blessed to facilitate so many years ago. If you would like to learn more about my book, you can do so here. You can purchase it here.

  • Mommies, what matters?

    A friend of mine asked on Facebook yesterday, “Mommies, what matters?”

    She said that one of her friends was told she was a bad mother because her kids wear hand-me-down clothes.
    Everyone who responded to this post completely disagreed with the thought. I am not surprised we all disagreed, but then I thought about it some more.

    First off, I am not planning on judging the person who made this comment. If you think about it, the world in which we live is obsessed with money and having the newest, best stuff. Often our feelings of self-worth are impacted by how we look, what we have, and how much money we make.

    Kids, especially teenagers, are really bombarded with this false reality. They get teased for how they are dressed, or for really anything about them that isn’t defined by their peers as cool. Perhaps that is why this person told this mother she was a bad mother. Who knows?

    Teasing is always going to be an issue. It will be hard to stop it. However, I know that we can raise our children in a way that teasing and bullying will not bother them. They will know who they are, how special they are, whose opinions really matter, and what things make a difference in their lives.

    How do we do this? Well, there are many experts who have their own opinions. I personally use the expertise of the one who created us. I use the scriptures, the word of God.

    How should I react when someone treats me badly?

    Matthew 5:44 – But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you.

    Luke 6:35 – But love ye your enemies, and do good, and lend, hoping for nothing again; and your reward shall be great, and ye shall be the children of the Highest: for he is kind unto the unthankful and to the evil.

    This is something all of us can do, whether we are a child getting teased, a mother being insulted, etc. Praying for someone who has hurt us can bring a lot of peace, for instead of hatred or bitterness or fear, we can feel compassion and mercy. We can feel the love that God has for that person, regardless of behavior.
    They think they are better than me because I don’t have what they have. Is that true?

    Matthew 5:45 –  …for he maketh his sun to rise on the evil and on the good, and sendeth rain on the just and on the unjust.

    Acts 10:34 – Then Peter opened his mouth, and said, Of a truth I perceive that God is no respecter of persons.

    Proverbs 22:2 – The rich and poor meet together: the Lord is the maker of them all.

    Regardless of earthly wealth and prestige, each of us is a child of God. He created all of us. God loves everybody unconditionally with a love we cannot even fathom, whether we follow Him or not.

    Is having the best stuff and looking the best really what makes people happy? Is it what we should want? Does it define who we are?

    1 Samuel 16:7 – But the Lord said unto Samuel, Look not on his countenance, or on the height of his stature; because I have refused him: for the Lord seeth not as man seeth; for man looketh on the outward appearance, but the Lord looketh on the heart.

    Proverbs 22:1 -A good name is rather to be chosen than great riches, and loving favour rather than silver and gold.

    Matthew 6:19-21 –  Lay not up for yourselves treasures upon earth, where moth and rust doth corrupt, and where thieves break through and steal: But lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust doth corrupt, and where thieves do not break through nor steal: For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also.

    1Timothy 6:10 –  For the love of money is the root of all evil: which while some coveted after, they have erred from the faith, and pierced themselves through with many sorrows.

    Doctrine and Covenants 18:10 –  Remember the worth of souls is great in the sight of God.

    The Lord counsels against the love of money, favor, and physical appearance. What matters is the richness of one’s soul and heart.

    If having lots of money and things aren’t important, what is?

    1Timothy 6:11 – But thou, O man of God, flee these things; and follow after righteousness, godliness, faith, love, patience, meekness.

    Matthew 6:33 –  But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.

    John 14:6 – Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me.

    Just as Jesus said in Matthew 6, lay up treasures in Heaven. This life is short. We can’t take our money, nice clothes, and fancy electronics with us. Our character, our faith, our love, our knowledge, we can take with us. As we try to be like Jesus and follow His perfect example, we will be blessed. What really matters is outlined beautifully in the beatitudes (Matthew 5:3-12). Any blessing the Lord gives to us is infinitely more valuable than anything we can acquire on earth.

    Based on all this, “Mommies, what matters?”

    Mosiah 4:14-15 – And ye will not suffer your children that they go hungry, or naked; neither will ye suffer that they transgress the laws of God, and fight and quarrel one with another, and serve the devil, who is the master of sin, or who is the evil spirit which hath been spoken of by our fathers, he being an enemy to all righteousness. But ye will teach them to walk in the ways of truth and soberness; ye will teach them to love one another, and to serve one another.
    3 John 1:4 – I have no greater joy than to hear that my children walk in truth

    Isaiah 54:13 –  And all thy children shall be taught of the Lord; and great shall be the peace of thy children.

    Parents have a sacred duty to rear their children in love and righteousness, to provide for their physical and spiritual needs, and to teach them to love and serve one another, observe the commandments of God, and be law-abiding citizens wherever they live…Happiness in family life is most likely to be achieved when founded upon the teachings of the Lord Jesus Christ. Successful marriages and families are established and maintained on principles of faith, prayer, repentance, forgiveness, respect, love, compassion, work, and wholesome recreational activities (The Family: A Proclamation to the World).

    J.KNOWLES HARE Lithograph-DEAR TO HER HEART-Mother Hugging Child
    My final thought is that only God needs judge if we are good mothers or not. It is not our place to worry about others’ choices. We need only worry about ourselves and what we teach our children by word and example.
    Mommies, you are doing better than you think you are. God loves you. He is on your side. He is with you. He trusts you with His precious children. May we all follow the word of the Lord as we teach our children in the way they should go.

  • Sabbath Day Light: A promise to receive answers

    My family is currently on vacation in Williamsburg, VA, so this Sunday morning we worshiped with fellow Latter-day Saints from the Jamestown area.

    At the beginning of our first meeting, a visiting local church leader gave us a promise. He promised that if this coming weekend, we watch all four sessions of General Conference, we will receive answers to all of the specific questions we currently have about our lives and our faith.

    For those of you who are not of my faith, you may be wondering what General Conference is. Well, every six months, in April and October, my church does a series of broadcasts from Salt Lake City, UT, to many countries around the world. In these broadcasts, which consists of five 2-hour sessions held over two days, we hear spiritual messages from the leaders of our church. Those who speak to us prayerfully choose what they will speak about, and their messages are meant to uplift, counsel and inform not only the members of the faith, but all the world.

    We believe that God still speaks to His children, and does so through living prophets. We believe that Thomas S. Monson, the President of our church, as well as his counselors, and the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles are prophets, seers and revelators. They receive direction directly from God for the benefit of His people. One profound mission of the apostles and prophets is to teach and testify of Jesus Christ to the world.

    If you would like to listen to some of their poignant testimonies of Christ, you can view them at this link: Special Witnesses of Christ. You can also view their pictures and biographies here: Meet Today’s Prophets and Apostles.

    Throughout these two days we hear from these divinely-appointed prophets and apostles. We also hear from other leaders of our church, such as leaders of our women’s organization, called the Relief Society, and many others.

    I always look forward to General Conference. I do not watch much television, but this is better than television. It is life-changing. It leaves me, and everyone who watches it with a prayerful heart, with new hope, renewed purpose, and an overwhelming feeling of love from not only the prophet and other church leaders, but from our Father in Heaven, and His son, Jesus Christ.

    In this world, there is so much confusion, so much hate, so much darkness. We can always find light when we follow Jesus Christ. We know we are following Him as we heed the words of His servants. To read more about why prophets are so important, read here:  We Need Living Prophets.

    The promise my congregation heard on Sunday applies to everyone who has an open heart and wishes to find answers of peace, hope, and love. I want you to watch General Conference and receive the blessings millions of people receive already: Come Join Us for General Conference.

    I know with all my heart that God still speaks, and does so through living prophets, just as He did anciently. I know that our prayers are heard. I know that we can walk in light. I know that God loves all of us and wants each of us to live with Him again. He has provided the way through prayer, though scriptures, and through His servants, the prophets. Come, join with us. You will be changed for the better.