It took me far too long to fall asleep last night. My heart was heavy with many things, but I finally went to sleep, hoping and praying that Asher, our six-month-old, actually slept well.
I found myself being suddenly awakened during the 3:00 hour. I could hear movement in my bathroom. Then a light went on, and something dropped a little too loudly.
I knew it was Eve, my six-year-old daughter. I was barely awake, but I dashed into the bathroom to try to quiet her and find out why she was there. I could hear what I dreaded most too – the baby waking up. Eve told me that she had planned to lay out the soft sleeping pad we have and sleep in our closet the rest of the night. This didn’t surprise me at all, and though this normally was a welcomed action, this time I whispered a little too harshly and told her to go back to her room.
Jad took our baby, Asher, who was indeed awake, so I could go back to sleep. I, of course, didn’t, because I usually can’t when I know the baby is up. Instead, I sat at the edge of the bed on the verge of tears, so, tired and feeling bad about sending Eve away.
A few minutes later, Jad gently placed the baby back in his bassinet. That was the fastest he had ever gone back to sleep. I should have felt relieved at that point- ready to drift back off to dreamland.
But I just lay there. I was thinking about the little girl – my little girl – who I had sent upstairs feeling unloved. I felt prompted to go to her. I hesitated, but only for a moment. I knew what I had to do.
It wasn’t easy to go up the stairs with my sore knee that I had hurt in a fall before church the day before, and then avoid the clutter in the long hallway, but I was nonetheless drawn to Eve’s room.
I knelt by her bed, caressed her cheek, and gave her a kiss. She opened her eyes and tearfully told me she was sorry. I apologized to her, saying I had actually been the one in the wrong.
She explained that she had had a bad dream and that she felt safer being around us, her parents. She knew she wouldn’t have any more bad dreams if she were with us. That melted my heart. I knew all along that was probably why she had come down. We said a prayer together, asking that Heavenly Father give her peace and comfort, and restful sleep until morning.
I told her I would stay with her until she fell back asleep. I tucked her in, stroked her hair, gave her a doll, adjusted her pillow, and just stayed next to her, holding her hand until she drifted back to sleep. At one point she told me she was okay and that I could go, because she knew I was tired, but I felt the desire to stay with my sweet girl until she was again at rest. It didn’t take long.
I felt so much better knowing that I had mended her little broken heart. Sleep did not come easily after that, but I was so grateful when little Asher slept until after 6am. I felt that was a little blessing that came to me from Heaven because I had listened to that spiritual prompting just a few hours before.
As I am writing this, Eve just walked into the office and gave me a hug, thanking me for coming to her last night. Then a little while later, during breakfast, she told her brothers how sweet I was to go to her and help her go back to sleep last night.
Imagine if I hadn’t listened to that prompting?
I decided to write about this experience because I want to remember that the Still Small Voice reached out to me and prompted me to do the right thing by my little girl. I am so grateful for the Holy Ghost who helps me right my wrongs and be a better person every day.
I’m also so grateful for my sweet Eve who is so loving, forgiving, and tender-hearted. She has so much love in her heart, and I hope to be as pure in my love as she is.
As a parent, I need to make sure that I am always aware of what my children need from me to feel safe, happy, and thriving. I’m grateful for the lesson I learned early this morning.